zaclizitong
Oct 21, 2012
Undergraduate / 'Playing flute and guitar' - CommonApp short answer essay [7]
HELP! CommonApp short answer essay!!!
Prompt: Please briefly elaborate on one of your extracurricular activities or work experiences in the space below (1000 character maximum).
Here is my essay:
I decided to join guitar ensemble in high school because I always admire great guitarists and imagine myself on stage playing electric guitar and sing rock songs. However, out of my expectation, the ensemble was nothing like a rock band and I almost quit because of this. Fortunately, I didn't. My two-year experience in the ensemble convinced my that I would definitely regret if I did because I learned the most significant lesson of my life here: servant-leadership. I had been a student leader for various groups and events for years and what I did was merely giving orders and ideas to others, but it wouldn't work in a 200-people ensemble. So I changed my approach, together with my executive committee members, I prolonged the opening hour of store room, reviewed duty roster system, helped members to clean their guitars and organized activities to forger bonds among members. As a result, I earned their respect and moreover, I made friends for life. I believe the guitar ensemble experience will root in my heart not just because of the guitar skills I learned or the six concerts I performed, but the friendship forged and the important lesson I learned here.
Feel free to point out any mistakes and provide suggestions! It will be great if you have any idea about how to make it shorter, the requirement is less than 1000 characters, but it's 1170 characters now. Thank you guys, I'll help to look through your essay if you need!
HELP! CommonApp short answer essay!!!
Prompt: Please briefly elaborate on one of your extracurricular activities or work experiences in the space below (1000 character maximum).
Here is my essay:
I decided to join guitar ensemble in high school because I always admire great guitarists and imagine myself on stage playing electric guitar and sing rock songs. However, out of my expectation, the ensemble was nothing like a rock band and I almost quit because of this. Fortunately, I didn't. My two-year experience in the ensemble convinced my that I would definitely regret if I did because I learned the most significant lesson of my life here: servant-leadership. I had been a student leader for various groups and events for years and what I did was merely giving orders and ideas to others, but it wouldn't work in a 200-people ensemble. So I changed my approach, together with my executive committee members, I prolonged the opening hour of store room, reviewed duty roster system, helped members to clean their guitars and organized activities to forger bonds among members. As a result, I earned their respect and moreover, I made friends for life. I believe the guitar ensemble experience will root in my heart not just because of the guitar skills I learned or the six concerts I performed, but the friendship forged and the important lesson I learned here.
Feel free to point out any mistakes and provide suggestions! It will be great if you have any idea about how to make it shorter, the requirement is less than 1000 characters, but it's 1170 characters now. Thank you guys, I'll help to look through your essay if you need!
