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Posts by Idealprism
Joined: Oct 28, 2012
Last Post: Dec 31, 2012
Threads: 2
Posts: 2  

From: United States of America

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Idealprism   
Dec 31, 2012
Undergraduate / 2 weeks in Quito & Ecuador/Cosmos, by Carl Sagan; Princeton's;Summer/Favorite Quote [NEW]

Princeton wants to know what I've done the last two summers in about 2500 characters (this one is 2,864 with spaces). Here we go!
***********************
The summer leading into my junior year of High School, I was presented with the best news possible. The stars had aligned in such a way that I could finally travel to Quito, Ecuador, for two weeks. This would also be the first flight I would take by myself; I alone approached Gate 15 and boarded the plane to a country thousands of miles away. When the plane finally descended through the mountain clouds eight hours later, I did not feel "at home." In fact, as my uncle came to pick me up outside of the terminal, I felt as if I were in a twilight realm. The harsh orange streetlamps illuminated strange buildings and bridges that had not existed before. The center of Quito had become a facsimile of Central Park, New York. As I met new family members, explored new buildings, and created new memories, I thought back to my mother, who was similarly disorientated after visiting her homeland after more than a decade. Upon my return home, I accepted that change had occurred and that I should not expect time, or people, to become static. Later that day, I researched the SATs and began to formulate a plan to prevent myself from becoming static.

I spent the entirety of my junior year working diligently to enter the top 5% of my class. While I may not have gotten the recommended eight hours of sleep each night, I did accomplish my goal and enjoyed myself along the way.

The summer of my senior year began with a phone call from the Ironbound section of Newark, New Jersey. I twirled around the room and possibly made some inhuman noises after my new employer asked me what shift I would like to work. A few days later, I received a letter in the mail from the American Legion with an itinerary for Boys' State. That summer was set to be one of the most enjoyable I have ever had. At Boys' State, not only did I reaffirm my patriotism, but I also created friendships with people from all over the state of New Jersey. And while I didn't go to Boys' Nation, I enjoyed working as a Councilman in the City of Adams. As soon as Boys' State was done, I contacted my employer and prepared myself for my first day of work. Although I had some experience working with children before, my first job at the Ironbound Community Summer Program was something completely new. There were some days where I sincerely hoped that these five-year-olds did not comprehend my sarcasm. However, I kept my sanity and eventually earned enough money to fund my college application fees and Advanced Placement Fees.

Although I accomplished many things during the past two years, I realize that I still have much to do in order to succeed. As such, I am going to make my senior year as productive as possible to prove to myself that I can keep moving. If I have learned anything from these past two summers, it is that nothing is static, including myself.

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Now Princeton wants to me to use my favorite quotation to tell them about an event that defined my values or changed my world, in 500-ish words. (303 here.)

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"I don't want to fall up through a hole and into the flame of power. I wish I knew which was true. I don't like not knowing." Cosmos, by Carl Sagan

"Don't touch that!" my uncle yelled. "You're going to ruin it!"
My uncle stared me down as I carefully put down several tiny, white tubes that extruded color when massaged. Perplexed and somewhat hurt, I asked him, "TĂ­o, what is this?"

He replied by snatching them, saying, "It's something for grown-ups, not for babies like you."
I quickly rubbed the tears from my eyes with my pudgy fingers and followed him out of his bedroom. From that day forward, I wanted to find out what the tubes were for. Why did he hide them from me? What were they for? I needed to know.

This desire to know, to understand, and to create became an integral part of my being. I spent many summers in my youth walking to the library alone, with an empty plastic bag, picking out books much like someone might pick out produce at a grocery store. Every book was a new adventure, a new sensation, and a new flavor of the world to experience. But I had to know more! My physical body could not get in the way of this. Thirst brought me through the sleepless nights associated with Honors courses and eventually brought me to another unknown.

I do not know what lies on the other side of this educational rift, but I cannot stand being ignorant. Carl Sagan's quote resonates with me because, in a sense, I am like the early humans his quote is referring to. I have much to learn about the workings of this world, and far more to understand about my place on this "mote of dust, suspended in a sunbeam."

********************
Thank you~
Idealprism   
Dec 31, 2012
Book Reports / The Curious Incident of the Dog in the Night-time - Columbia supp/ Meaningful book [2]

(perhaps you could say "the fifteen year old narrator who suffers from mild autism.") I started admiring Christopher for his honesty, determination, and ability to set 'impossible' goals for himself. He wanted to pass A-levels (A-levels? I'm not familiar with the book, so is this a phrase used in the book?) despite his illness, solve the mystery of the death of his neighbor's dog, find his mother, write a book and attend a university. Christopher acknowledges that he is different from other people; he also acknowledges that he is at a disadvantage in certain areas but is nevertheless determined to face his biggest fears to achieve his goals. Christopher doesn't lie because he can't empathize due to his illness but(shouldn't it be "so" so something along those lines?) his story demonstrates that being truthful makes life less complicated.

I would suggest varying your sentence structure to avoid starting so many sentences with "Christopher."
You should also try to keep a consistant tense throughout the essay.


I wish you the best of luck! I hope everything goes well with Colombia :D
Idealprism   
Dec 31, 2012
Undergraduate / DONUT & Protecting people; Common App/ EXPERIENCE [9]

I really love this essay. It says so much about you while mixing in events from your past.
My only criticism would be this sentence:
"My inspiration grew from my childhood dream of being a superhero and protecting people like my family, a dream that began in a humble doughnut store."

I understand that you're emphasizing the origin of your morals, but I think you could make it a bit more concise.
Good Luck! :D
Idealprism   
Dec 31, 2012
Undergraduate / ARTIST/ COOKING/ Conversations on MYSTERIES; Harvard's / Future Roommate [2]

Well, here we go! I hope this letter is as warm and humorous as I intended it to be.
The prompt said something along the lines of "If you feel you have more to say, choose one of these optional topics! (Write a letter to your future roommate).

*****************************
To my roommate from a possible future,

If you're reading this, it means we've both gotten into Harvard (expletive) College! Well, I won't waste any time with descriptions of how perfect I am, because that will fall apart almost immediately. Instead, I'll indulge you in some of my quirkier habits. I'm an artist, which means the laws of nature dictate that I am eccentric. For example, if you wake up one fine morning to find half of the room covered in newspaper and what appears to be unicorn vomit, it is the result of a midnight breakthrough. Don't hesitate to talk to me about my artwork; I'll gladly listen to what you have to say about my pieces and use your criticisms to better myself. So if you see me putting an unhealthy amount of effort into my artwork, don't stop me. Perfection, although physically impossible to achieve, is something I strive to infinitely approach. As such, it's perfectly fine if you throw a pillow in my general direction if my desk lamp is piercing your eyes at 5 o'clock in the morning. And, yes, you're more than welcome to join me in my sleepless nights and caffeine fueled bouts of productivity. I'll gladly pour you a cup of tea (provided we have cups), brewed with the best ingredients, like Cinnamon Bark and Chamomile from my family in Ecuador. That reminds me; you're going to know how to cook by the end of the year, because cooking is a necessary survival skill where I come from. I don't care if dinner is fried ramen; we will eat like kings every day in our new home away from home.

But before I start to sound like a narcissist, I'd love to know more about you, SchrĂśdinger's Roommate. I sincerely hope we can converse about the mysteries of the universe and have a civilized, navel-contemplating conversation when we aren't drowning in essays and studying. I really can't wait until we begin out first steps towards world domination! Remember, if you see a disheveled Hispanic nerd with a disproportionately large book bag, that's most likely me.

Here's hoping that the random fluctuations of quantum mechanics are in our favor!
-Anthony Chicaiza
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