Unanswered [19] | Urgent [0]

Posts by amandaisabel
Joined: Nov 24, 2012
Last Post: Nov 26, 2012
Threads: 2
Posts: 4  
Likes: 1
From: United States of America

Displayed posts: 6
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Nov 26, 2012
Undergraduate / 'Not just the atomic theory to the world' - UC personal 1 [5]

Great essay it first leads the reader to believe you are going to be chemist but you surprised us at the end. Give a more passionate sentence about journalism and how important it is to you.
Nov 25, 2012
Undergraduate / UC my world - The trip to Ecuador [2]

Prompt: Describe the world you come from - for example, your family, community or school - and tell us how your world has shaped your dreams and aspirations.

We are on the plane again, luckily I was able to snatch the window seat so I could wave goodbye to the green bushel country of Ecuador. It wasn't at all as I expected it to be, all the imaginary scenes that were created in my head couldn't come close to the roads, houses, people, beaches, animals, weather, clothes, or foods. This new realm was unfamiliar to the place I called home, it was like I became Dorothy from the Wizard of Oz. Reflecting back on the three week adventure in Quito it soon turned into an understanding of where I came from.

The adventure started on a windy road. Bump after bump through mountains with unpaved roads and puncturing rocks; my mother's aunt took us for a ride in a small car for more than four hours. Once we reached our destination the sky grew overcast in a split second and rain came pouring down. It was quite strange, I thought it only rained in winter, its July. I was forced to enter a narrow canoe, which had a hint of deterioration, with no lifejacket. The positive of the adventure was seeing all the animals in their natural habitat. Who knew there was a world so natural and unindustrialized? It was a kid's dream playground with tall wet tress and mosquito's leaving marks on your flesh to remind you that it was all real.

The lushes' country was so different from the small-enclosed environment of the suburbs; which was my world, I had no idea there was more than what I knew. Walking through the claustrophobic city streets of Ecuador looking up at the apartment buildings reaching so high that it made the sky seem tangible, brought familiar feelings of L.A. However, the roads at home weren't brick or dirt, the air didn't make you cough every time you breathed, and most importantly the poverty isn't as apparent. Every where we went whether it was going for a walk through a park, going toward Cotopaxi (Andes Mountains), or stuck in traffic, the children begged for anything. There were more hands held up than I could count and with each new face meeting mine despair grew in my heart. Knowing I couldn't save all of them right away, I vowed to come back and disperse of those hands.

After hearing the soul of the people and learning their traditions, the appreciation I had for my culture billowed farther than the sea. Ecuador will always be apart of me and the chance I had to dip myself into the culture by physically being in it attributed a dream of mine. And that is to become educated in other cultures and be exposed to more worlds so that I could find a commonality in all people. If only society could take a trip outside of their personal worlds, only then will our country as a whole come to an understanding of other countries and their beliefs.
Nov 24, 2012
Undergraduate / common app essay- Saint Thomas vs Penn Relays [2]

It's a great obstacle that you faced and you clearly showed how you overcame the challenge! Try not to use so many "I"s in your sentences and combine short sentences like My parents spent many hours contemplating the idea. Finally, they agreed. Their decision to let me come home early meant the world to me. instead of saying this, try something like " After countless hours my parents finally agreed to allow me to come home early, that decision meant the world.
Nov 24, 2012
Undergraduate / 'cold weather and historical background' - Boston University Supplement [4]

Prompt: Why is BU a good fit for you?

"We Dare You." Upon receiving a forty eight page booklet of Boston University covered with this phrase and my favorite color, I couldn't help to open it. Slowly reading every page, I had a clear overview of the pursuits, campus life, and current work the school was doing. Flipping through the pages a decision was made. Each fact and informative footnote on the sides of the pages accured a straight forward message that was adhering to my name. Especially since the passion i plan on pursuing in college is exactly what one student experienced by going to Peru. She saw "firsthand the struggles and resiliency of the Peruvian people (page 21)." Boston University focuses on using the world as a classroom setting, because we learn so much more from being exposed to reality then reading it in a book.

I believe this university fits me to a T, from the cold weather to its historical background and th big city lights. I'm ready to take the dare and venture off to a city where things are done to change the world. What more can I say? I even took the , "Will I like it here?" quiz and scored one hundred points! It's pretty simple, I know I will be molded into a great leader in becoming a Boston Terrier.
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