Posts by plummzz

plummzz_2436

Jan 1, 2013

Undergraduate / Creating my own stream in this fast-paced world; Masters in Economics/ WHY NYU? [2]

A place of possibilities and diverse population constantly shuffling every single second. This sentence sounds very awkward for some reason probably because of your addition of the word 'constantly.' ~~These are how~~ That's grammatically incorrect it should be This is how

You have a lot of grammar mistakes in here like the word 'affords.'
What I do like is the last sentence.I think this paragraph has a lot of potential but it just need to be worked on like the organization of the sentence, words, etc

Can you please read my thread and give me feedback

plummzz_2436

Jan 1, 2013

Undergraduate / My people; BARNARD/ Community & my perspective [2]

YOU CAN CRITIQUE TO YOUR HEARTS CONTENT. PLZ HELP I WILL RETURN THE FAVOR!

D. Community - educational, geographic, religious, political, ethnic, or other - can define an individual's experience and influence her journey. How has your community, as you identify it, shaped your perspective?

I live in a building. A building, that is tattered with graffiti and peeling painting. A building, that doesn't look so pretty from the outside. But that doesn't matter. At least to me. It is, the inside that counts, right? The people that I have known for most of my life live here. These are the people that I can go to at the middle of the night and ask for a cup of sugar without being embarrassed. The people who are occasionally too noisy. The people who have sometimes made my life a living hell and other times a picnic. The people that that have shaped me as the human being I am today all live in this building. A place that I have grown up to call 'home'. A place that I identify as a little community of its own-a community that has shown me to be caring towards others, to have patience, and most of all to accept and respect other people for who they are inside. This community of mine has shaped me for the better.