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Posts by pamcirin
Name: Tyler Cirincione
Joined: Oct 20, 2013
Last Post: Oct 20, 2013
Threads: -
Posts: 1  

From: United States of America
School: Shenendehowa

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pamcirin   
Oct 20, 2013
Undergraduate / Obstacles and conflicts are everyday occurrences [3]

How our lives go are greatly determined by all obstacles and trials we face throughout. Change how this is worded. sounds awkward.

My biological father and I's relationship was never a "real" relationship. Change this to my relationship with my biological father has never been a "real" relationship. Then explain why.

I have gained many skills through my experience that I feel confident about using in the future of my medical career. change the wording of this sentence. You never really said what skills you gained and you say in this sentence you gained many skills. Your essay only taps on a few.