Scholarship / 'No work until you graduate' - How do i overcome an obstacle in life; SCHOLARSHIP [5]

This essay is for a scholarship that is due tomorrow, and this is what i got so far.
I need your help for any ideas on what to add to it.. (It has to be no more than 500 words)
ANY IDEA OR SPELLING CORRECTION WILL BE APPRECIATED. Thank you..
Here's my essay (what i got so far)

The way i'm overcoming an obstacle in life is that my parent's are not letting me work until i graduate high school. My father says ''money changes your way of thinking'' and he doesn't want me to be like that. Our Family is passing through poor economy and stress, Theres times my parent's can't afford to pay the house bills in which i don't get to have new cloth, not enough food, or materials for projects or field trips. It's depressing seeing my parents sad because they can't get a better job,That's why i'm looking forward to go to college to have a secure and well paid job. This is a good opportunity to advance my education and be able to help my parents with their incomes, at the same time, i want to support my whole family living in mexico so they don't have to struggle with low salary jobs as well. For me to be able to break this miserable cycle i need to go to college and graduate within 4 to 5 years of education. This is how i am overcoming an obstacle in my life.

Undergraduate / I have the ability to help others; UNNOTICED [2]

Hello!
I'm applying for the university of Wisconsin Madison and i was given a statement about ''something in your life you think goes unnoticed and write about why it's important to you.''

Any help on my essay will be appreciate it, thanks!
Daniel.
Here's my essay:

I , as a High school Student everyone thinks i'm a professional using advanced computer software's , but i ask myself '' is this the field i want ? '' is this the career i want to pursue? to be a computer teacher?'' What people don't really notice on me is the ability to speak to others. I have the ability to help other's people problem's to express them selves. Why is this important to me? Here's why, when i was just 10 years old, i always noticed my friends crying... even family members, but i never knew why and how i could help them.. it was just depressing seeing my own mother cry, that was too much for me and had the guts to ask a friend ''carlos'' why he was crying. He responded me by saying '' My dad passed away last night because of cancer'' as he sobbed and kept telling his story, my brain started to work and somehow i said '' If your dad was here right now, he would hug you tightly and say '' Don't worry about me, your job is to graduate from high school and get a better job to take care of your mother.'' Carlos cried of happiness and thanked me for motivate him. This was the moment i knew that i should be a motivator, Let them know that i'm here for them. This is something that goes unnoticed on me but it is really important to me.