Writing Feedback / IELTS writing: email and text messaging threats written language [6]

This is my writing!It would be great to hear some comments from all of you! Thanks!

TOPIC: Email and text messaging have transformed communication but they are seriously threatening the status of written language. How far do you agree or disagree with this statement?

The introduction of email and text messaging has brought about considerable changes in communication. With this situation, some people believe that they may be factors decreasing the position of written language. I am in favor of that idea because of their advantages and the fact we can see today about the use of these new means.

First of all, it is easy to point out many benefits users can get from email and text messaging, which answers to the question of their great popularity. Before email and mobile phone, human beings communicated by meeting directly, sending letters or later, calling from home phones. Such ways usually made people have troubles for the expensiveness, difficulties in far communication or emergency and the loss of information. However, email and cell phones have improved the obstacles above. People can send or receive electronic letters anywhere and anytime they want. Especially, thanks to the function provided by email and text messaging (SMS), it is cheaper and faster to transfer a lot of information, even to many people at the same time. They are so convenient that the majority of population prefer to use them instead of some traditional ways.

The popularity of email and text messaging, as a result, leads to the losing of written language's position. People tend to use slangs and abbreviated words to shorten their writing and save more time in communicating for other activities. The outcome is that language in writing is not in its original form. Even in some cases, people compose a message with only emoticons (the expressions by face created by service providers), which means there is no room for writing or typing texts. Moreover, it is more dangerous that youngsters sometimes use such new languages in their studying, writing assignments. If that tendency continues at a rapid pace, written language may face up to a real problem about its stand.

In conclusion, we cannot deny the threat from email and text messaging to the status of written language because their obvious popularity. Nevertheless, educators and individuals themselves, especially the youths should pay ore attention to this matter so that we can take advantages of the new language along with preserving the traditional one.

(Time: 35 mins)

Writing Feedback / Today, the dominance of global product brands threatens individual identity [5]

Please give me comment on my writing!Thank you!
TOPIC: In today's world, the dominance of global product brands is increasingly threatening our identity as individuals. How far do you agree or disagree with this statement?

My writing:(written for 37min)

Today, more and more brands are appearing, many of which have become popular all over the world. Such international trademarks have so great an influence on human life that some people believe they are gradually making them lose their identities. In my opinion, however, it is not always a case as some worry because of the different ways people choose and use a product.

Firstly, human beings have various tastes for the same kind of product. Although well-known brands attract a number of people, each of them can actually appeal to a certain group of customers. Therefore, everyone has their own ways to choose a good which also reflects their own identities or favors. It is easily pointed our that Chanel may be the most popular fashion brand but this does not mean that all girls and women want to wear its clothes. They may choose Versace instead because such clothes help them express their special characteristics. In short, people usually tend to use products of their interests, not for the brands.

Moreover, customers in different countries also have different ways to utilize a good. Any global trademarks have to conform to local conditions or conventions so that they can satisfy buyers of another identity. Advertisements should contain familiar images about everyday life in the country where the companies are working. In other word, famous brands depend much on the markets. Besides, despite human tendency to follow new things, international companies cannot impose the same way to use the product on every nation. For example, eventhoug KFC is a kind of fast food and is enjoyed for about fifteen minutes each time in foreign countries, it still takes the Vietnamese one to two hours to finish a helping. That fact comes from Vietnamese people's habit of coming to a restaurant to eat and meet friends, which means we, the Vietnamese substain our traditional identities.

To sum up, global brands can spread their dominance to every corner of the earth; nevertheless, they cannot sweep individuals' identities to the corner. People can keep their own styles different from the others' and their countries' from the rest of the world by the way they select and use a product.

PS: In my writing, there are some brand names. I am not sure that it is legal to do that. If not, please tell me so that i will not make the same mistake in future.Thanks!