Undergraduate /
'A white piece paper with a huge, red F' - Academic Geek - Describe a challenge [2]
A white piece paper with a huge, red F hangs on the fridge door like it's mocking me as I open the fridge door every day. Ironically, maybe if I drew straight line to make the F look like an A I could convince myself I was the winner; I got the A. However, I didn't that F was a daily reminder of my flaw.
During second week of junior year, I was in math class, and my teacher was handing out the class's first graded test. I was a nervous wreck with sweaty palms, non-stopping foot tapping, and continuously nail biting. I knew the second the paper fell in my hands, a nightmare was about to begin. I told myself a C is not that bad. However, an unexpected letter was on my test. There an F was stamped on my test. I thought it was a dream; so I pinched myself. I checked and checked for any mistakes that the teacher made. Sadly, she made none. I told myself that everything is going to be fine even if I knew it wasn't. I tried to hold off the tears till school ended. As soon as I went home, I went to my room, slammed the door, and cried till my eyes were puffy and red. I was devastated and scared for the rest of the year. My whole week was ruined. My mom kept telling it was okay and even bought me ice-cream to cheer me up, but nothing worked. My world has been broken to pieces. I thought my life was over. After the depression stage, I moved towards hatred towards my teacher. However, I knew that I should be the one to blame. I decided the best way to forget this nightmare was to sleep. The next day I went to school, trying to be optimistic about this experience. In math class, my teacher announced that students could retake the test. That moment I could see angels and hear choir singing "hallelujah". I saw the beautiful light from the darkness that surrounded me. Immediately, I came up with a plan to get an A on the retake. I stayed every day after school consulting with my teacher, studied at least an hour every day, and before test day I studied till I fell asleep. I woke up the next day feeling confident. I went to math class and looked at the retake. I blanked out, suddenly forgot everything, and my self-esteem went down the drain. The only thought that occurred to me was to finish the test and leave the horrid math class. Two days later, I received the test with a big C. I felt relieved, but still depressed. As I saw my friends smiling, I thought to myself life continues; there's always next time. My plan was to get a higher grade on the second test, and I succeed.
Oddly, instead of feeling confident, I felt anxiety and nervousness up to the moment I got the test. Two days later, I received my grade. A beautiful big, red A with a smiley face was marked on my test. I thought I was daydreaming, so I told my friend to pinch me. But, I was not.
From this experience I learned that a challenge can always be defeated. As long as I am motivated and devoted to a goal, the goal can be succeeded. Even when it seems like your world is falling apart and there is no way of escaping, a light is shined upon somewhere. Failures in life taught me that I can conquer anything as long I put my mind and heart to it. This challenge tested my ability to accept my imperfection and defeat. Over the year, my failure will be covered by accomplishments, and my self-reliance will rise
