Graceyxp15
Jan 14, 2014
Undergraduate / I grew up in the rural countryside of China; Story central-- A Passion in Biology [5]
Hi, I love the way you related to a personal anecdote that is common but unique in your perception of the idea, and how you grew up to be as passionate about biological sciences as you were a kid. I am applying for biomedical engineering myself, so I can see your passion and motivation toward your dream.
Maybe after the day and night dissemination, few of the seeds of poplar can find a home and sprout, but at least one small catkin from that summer had landed in heart, rooted and grown into a strong admiration, love and commitment.
This sentence is pretty good, I think. I'm especially into this kind of stories.
I think you should add a few sentences about how you worked toward your passion on biology, like participating in lab activities, etc. But you already sound pretty good when you explained the what the concept"live" is to you, so you will be fine if you don'y want to.
And as impatient101 said, you should make modifications to your sentences, maybe have a literature teacher read your essays.
Good luck! Hope you get in your dream school.
Hi, I love the way you related to a personal anecdote that is common but unique in your perception of the idea, and how you grew up to be as passionate about biological sciences as you were a kid. I am applying for biomedical engineering myself, so I can see your passion and motivation toward your dream.
Maybe after the day and night dissemination, few of the seeds of poplar can find a home and sprout, but at least one small catkin from that summer had landed in heart, rooted and grown into a strong admiration, love and commitment.
This sentence is pretty good, I think. I'm especially into this kind of stories.
I think you should add a few sentences about how you worked toward your passion on biology, like participating in lab activities, etc. But you already sound pretty good when you explained the what the concept"live" is to you, so you will be fine if you don'y want to.
And as impatient101 said, you should make modifications to your sentences, maybe have a literature teacher read your essays.
Good luck! Hope you get in your dream school.