Writing Feedback / Movies & TV affect people. 'Vietnamese man who hasn't gone to other countries' [9]

Topic 7: How do movies or TV affect people?
The 20th century witnessed a great amount of discoveries and inventions, many of which changed our way of live drastically. TV is a typical example for those changes. Thanks to TV, ordinary people can have views of things happening all over the world, therefore broadening their general knowledge. TV also provides householders with so much guide and assistance that facilitate their lives significantly. Finally, TV helps improve relationships between people. These points will be examined closely as follows.

First of all, knowledge can be acquired owing to televisions. A person living in some tropical country may be curious about wildlife in the North Pole. By watching Discovery channel, he or she can get the notion of how well a polar bear camouflages in order to hunt rabbits in the most vivid way, which is obviously impossible without television. The more knowledge we have, the more self-confident we feel about ourselves. Therefore, television can improve mental intellectual aspects of human's life.

Secondly, television gives us aid in our daily life. There are 24/7 live broadcasts on TV which inform us of current hot deals in the market as well as where we can purchase them. In the early 20th century, people might have read newspaper frequently and still found it hard to procure things they wanted. Now, television provides them with contacts so that customers can possess necessary items in the simplest and most convenient way.

Last but not least, it is television that eases the way we interact with each other. I am a Vietnamese man who hasn't gone to other countries. However, thanks to movies and films shown on television, I can understand another culture. I know how Indian people cook their curry so I can talk to my Indian friend at university about it more comfortably. I can learn about Japanese etiquette of drinking tea, so I can gossip with my Japanese roommate more and more. These are necessary especially when we now live in a flatter world where virtually all borders can be erased thanks to technology.

To sum up, television benefits us in many aspects of life. Of course one can argue that bad things and wrongdoings may accompany with those benefits, but judging on the way we lead our life now, television has a positively integral part in every single family.

Can someone please let me know my weaknesses. I will take the TOEFL in 2 days so it would be kind of anyone to provide me with some remark so I can improve a little bit.

Thanks a lot.