Posts by janice

janice

Jul 28, 2006

Undergraduate / English is necessary to everyone; three important essay subjects [2]

My teacher has assigned another topic. Your last feedback was very helpful to me.
Could you please give me some commons about this essay? Thank you very much for your help!!

What are the three important subjects to you? Why?

There are many courses offered by high schools. All of the courses are important to us, but I believe that English, biology, and geography are the most important subjects.

First of all, studying English is necessary to everyone because we live in an English-speaking country. If we do not learn English, we will have trouble communicating with others. In addition, most textbooks, novels, and newspapers are written in English. How can we gain knowledge without taking an English course? Besides, as I looked at the "Employment" section in newspapers, most jobs require an applicant who can speak English fluently and can write very well. Therefore, English is essential to all careers.

Biology is a significant subject as well, as it teaches us the functions of various parts of our bodies, and the ways to keep our bodies healthy. Did you know that drinking Coke and coffee at a young age will cause you to shrink when you are older? Did you know that people who sleep longer have a longer memory than people who sleep less? Did you know that heart attack and high blood pressure are caused by your high fat diet when you are a teenager? By taking biology, we know how to prevent our bodies from getting those painful diseases.

Pollution is a serious problem nowadays, so we must study geography to learn how to protect our environment. According to my geography teacher, much of our groundwater is contaminated from the chemical fertilizers, pesticides, and herbicides seeped from the farmland. Moreover, as population increases, more wastes are produced. These wastes not only emit toxic chemicals into our atmosphere, but also take up a lot of spaces. My teacher told me that we should all reduce, reuse, and recycle things as much as we can, in order to alleviate this problem. For farmers, they should use natural fertilizers instead of chemical fertilizers to grow their crops.

In conclusion, by taking English, biology, and geography at high school, I have gained so much valuable knowledge and skills. I will continue to take these subjects at university so that I can become a successful person for our country.

janice

Jul 21, 2006

Writing Feedback / Do you like to smell the strong cigarette smoke at public places? NO! [3]

Hello! I'm a Grade 12 student. My teacher has assigned the following topic. I wonder if anybody can give me some commons about my essay before I hand in to my teacher.

Thank you very much!

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Ontario and Quebec governments have recently set up a law against smoking in public places, including restaurants, pubs, or clubs. Agree or disagree with this law. Explain your answers.

Do you like to smell the strong cigarette smoke at restaurants? Do you like to sit nearby a smoker? If you answer "no" (should "n" be capitalized?) to these questions, you will be glad to see that a law, which bans smoking in all public places, has been set up in Quebec and Ontario, and I totally agree to this law. It is because this law is beneficial to non-smokers, smokers, and business owners that I agree to it.

On the one hand, prohibiting smoking in public places provides a healthy environment for non-smokers and children. Many people, including me, are not cigarette smokers. Most of us hate to inhale second-hand smoke emitted by smokers, so we often have to hold our breath while passing through clouds of noxious fumes. After this law is established, we do not need to worry about being poisoned by second-hand smoke anymore.

On the other hand, in consequence of restricting cigarette addicts' smoking place, smokers may smoke less frequently than they used to. As a result, their health can (be?) improved gradually. In fact, A Canadian Health Magazine has shown if smokers have stopped smoking for twenty-four hours, their blood pressure will return to normal, their cilia in the bronchi will start to beat up again, and their chances of getting lung cancers will be reduced by one-fifth. Also, since they smoke infrequently, they can save thousands of dollars on buying cigarettes over the years.

Furthermore, this law can indirectly help to boom business industry. The restaurants have a much cleaner and healthier environment than before. No more toxic fumes flowing in the restaurants, more customers would like to go to their places to have a drink. Besides, business owners no longer need to worry about their stores being damaged by the burning cigarettes. Therefore, the chances of fire hazards in public places will be reduced by the establishment of this law.

Although some people may think that this law restricts smokers' freedom, I believe that Quebec and Ontario governments have made an excellent choice. I really hope that our province could also create this law so that our health can be improved as well.