Writing Feedback / The wide-spread use of labor-saving devices has only made our life much more hectic. [3]

Warm Greetings Users and Experts,
I'm appearing for an essay competition soon in the age category of 15-16 years old. Please do help me by pointing out my errors in this essay.

Thank you :D
Regards
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In this present day and age, we are surrounded by a myriad of devices which aid us in reducing our work.These devices, which help abase our workload, are collectively termed as "labor-saving" devices. Interestingly, all devices created so far are contrived with the object of abating our toil and hence, all of them are classified as labor-saving devices, right from calculators to laptops to vehicles.However, there is much argument about the fact of these machines effectively reducing our workload. Incontrovertibly, they help in lessening our drudgery in respect of a particular task but pragmatically, I believe that with their invention and widespread use, there has been an augment in our overall labor work, making our lives much more hectic

Foremost,I'd like to differentiate between the erstwhile and contemporary generation as it is oft believed that people in the primordial times led a rather stress-free life. This belief is utterly veracious for they lived with an aim of only thriving through their lives. These people,unsophisticated in nature, only yearned to acquire adequate eatables for themselves so as to live their lives. However, with a precipitation of some kind of scientific temper imbued in the later generation, mankind making revolutionary discoveries. With an accreit of such products, we started fabricating higher goals and aims for ourselves. Adopting such goals did succor in further development in the field of science and technology but alongside also engendered in the development of a plethora of stress amongst people.

The invention of such devices has not only made our work easy but also widened the prospect of our work . To further corroborate with my opinion, I shall cite a particular example to which many of us can relate to. For instance, if a corporate,bourgeois employee with a perfunctory vocation, is bestowed a personal laptop from his employer, this gesture will be perceived as one of approbation. Also, for the employee, it might signify lesser work as he could thereafter use the portable device to complete his pending work even when he is away from office. However, there is no such limit on the amount of work that can be done and hence, he would end up working much more,gradually lessening his personal time which is replaced bu his laptop work. This dearth of private time is what makes our life more hectic.Furthermore, through a multitudinous number of surveys psychologists have deduced that citizens of a developed country, in comparision with developing countries, lead a much more hectic lifestyle. These results can be co-related with the fact that citizens of developed countries are much more exposed to such "labor-saving devices" than the latter,

Humans, as we know, have got the inevitable propensity of always wanting more. These devices, instead of helping us to reduce our work, further assist us in our pursuit of gaining "more", a pursuit which is impossibly to be achieved. Hence, to make optimum utilization of these beneficial gadgets, we must draw a line between their use and over-dependence of on them, a restriction which is of utmost importance if we desire to live bereft of copious stress.

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Writing Feedback / Nuclear weapons, boon or curse ? [6]

Greetings writers !
I've come up with an essay pertaining to the topic : Since the invention of nuclear weapons we have had a long period of GLOBAL peace and stability. Are nuclear weapons global peacemakers or killing devices?

I'd really appreciate any reviews on my essay :D

INVENTION OF NUCLEAR WEAPONS
Nuclear weapons are considered to be the most pernicious form of weaponry and there is much controversy about the aftermath of its invention. The first nuclear weapon, which was the nuclear bomb, was contrived by the United States of America in 1945. Not three weeks later, the world witnessed a catastrophic and a gruesome incident- The Hiroshima and Nagasaki shelling. Americans dropped two nuclear bombs on these places, expeditiously but rather in a rather sacrilegious, putting an end to the Pacific War. Ever since then, a myriad of countries have started concocting their own nuclear weapons. Irrefutably, the question arises, what effects nuclear weapons have on global peace and stability.

A multitude of countries, in an attempt to protect their various rights and to fortify their defence units, have begun to manufacture nuclear weapons. There are five states classified as "Nuclear Superpowers" under Nuclear Non-Proliferation Treaty and an approximate other ten which have successfully detonated nuclear weapons in past. With advancement in technology and science, there is advancement in military weapons as well. Many countries, fearful of being dominated by other nuclear states, are piqued to manufacture their own nuclear weapons. Hence, we arrive at an incontrovertible conclusion that militarization with respect to nuclear weapons is at an augment.

In my opinion, deploying nuclear artilleries and manufacturing such weapons of mass destruction, is deleterious to world peace and stability. It exacerbates the tensions between nations with historically unsatisfactory relations and strains ties between conciliatory nations. Moreover, countries have a propensity to use nuclear weapons as means of attack since they do cataclysmic destruction and its after-effects prevail on in generations to come. Hence, it has become highly probable that an inconsequential activity might trigger a brutal nuclear war, precipitating devastatingly unreasonable consequences. Nuclear weapons thus, in no way set parameters for achieving global peace.

Before concluding, I'd like to elucidate that nuclear technology can be used for meritorious work as well such the generation of electricity. It is of utmost importance to prohibit manufacturing of nuclear weapons as they drive us away from the ultimate goal of achieving global peace. United Nations must play a pro-active role in demilitarizing nuclear states and establishing more Nuclear-Free Territory Zones, adding to the contemporary five, and to foster peaceful settlement of disputes. All in all, we need to demean the chances of another war, which would claim a gargantuan number of lives and cause much more destruction than previous wars.

A thank you in advance. :'D