Undergraduate /
'Don't come here again! Loser!' Identity Essay Common app [9]
Hey :-) I have re-fixed the first five paragraphs the way you said I should.I don't know how to end the essay since I've lost it to the first already. In the first paragraph,I wrote down what you wrote but it's just to save time;I'll still change it.Look at it,and tell me what needs more fixing(some places seem disorganized).I am a really bad writer,so I'm sorry for the stress.Also,do you find the story "interesting"?
Inequality exists in our world because of diversities and personalities of each person.It is the nature of man to want to achieve the best and prove his worth in collective engagements such as sports.Sport is a game where all men can play but not all can succeed.I can play football but ,as my prevous experiences have shown,cannot succeed stemming from inequality of upbringing relative to my peers.
Growing up, I wasn't allowed to hang out with other kids in our neighborhood.My parents feared I might turn out a rascal.The only opportunity I had socializing was at school.Football was the main activity at school,but there were certain reasons I hardly participated in it.During breaks certain kids would choose who would play and to make the matches competitive and entertaining,they would try selecting only skilled players. Whenever I was selected, I would run back and forth across the football field while others scored goals,made saves and resisted their opponents.Those days were not too long as it got to the point when I wasn't chosen at all. I couldn't really decipher why playing came naturally to others and not me? Why? And for the fear of being embarrassed, I just couldn't approach them to teach me how to play: I was also considered weak because I wouldn't be seen climbing a tree,starting a fight or performing backflips.
I resolved to give up trying to belong.I remained the quiet kid at school.Alone during breaks.Alone when going home. When I turned nine, my parents finally let me join our neighbors on the streets. I picked up from where I stopped at school.My social life steadily improved. But I discovered that my peers couldn't really associate well with me;I still had the same problem I had at school.I tried to get my football skills up to par on my own.I worked really hard at it.I got a football from my dad,practiced when I came back from school,on weekend evenings,anytime I had the chance to.But it seemed like the harder I pressed,the worse I got.Anytime I was chosen to play,I would make one flop or the other.I didn't have the skills other kids had. Being selected to play became a privilege for me.Anytime they did, I would try hard to impress them. When I played on some days, I would be lucky enough not to be noticed at all.But on other days I would usually end up with a punch in my stomach,a knock or a slap.I allowed it not only because I couldn't fight back but also because I didn't feel it was right to fight back. I couldn't tell my parents of the humiliation I was facing.My social life was more important.
Zonal matches were something I never dreamt of playing.They were very consequential.I had that in mind when I pleaded to play the day before I was beaten mercilessly.I wanted to try.I wanted to be seen.I wanted my colleagues to know I could stand up in the big days.I wanted to be a surprise.I wanted respect.I was hoping that the worst case scenario would be like one of those days where I won't be noticed.I got none of that.I missed two goals that I should clearly have scored.This time it wasn't just about my talent at football;It was also about nervousness.Even a young and inexperienced player would have scored with those opportunities. ''Don't come here again! Loser!
"Tunde I thought I asked you not to select this boy?"
"Look at how pathetic he played."
"Go away!Don't return!"
That was Ade yelling at me.He was the biggest and strongest amongst us 10-11 year old kids and chose who would play the zonal football matches.I lay on the floor,curled up, wincing at the pain of the bruises I had sustained.I had been surrounded and beaten by eight kids,with sticks and punches,like I was a thief.Whenever I tried to escape,a hard blow would send me back to the floor.
That event made my social life inconsequential. I retracted from people I no longer considered my friends.I could see in their eyes,anytime I came outside,something begging me to come back.Something telling me that they were sorry for what they did.But I wasn't sure;none of them swallowed their pride to tell me such.And I wouldn't go back on my decision anyway.From then on,my going outside was either to buy sweets and biscuits or just to feel the serenity of being outside itself.In secondary school it was a different story.Throughout primary school I was consistently in the top two of the class.I was enthusiastic about learning.I loved science,art,commerce ,mathematics.But no one was interested in that.The real fun was playing.One could either play,or stay alone depressed.Secondary school accepted me the way I was.It made me realize I could be social academically.My peers were supportive.I could comfortably talk about how a chemical reaction starts and someone else interested in music could talk about the latest song release.That was how I had always wanted my life to be but rather it was based on discrimination. Isolation because I was weak.Discrimination because football didn't come naturally to me.My childhood could have made me a worse person.But it did the exact opposite because I know what is right and I know how it feels to be oppressed for being different.
