Undergraduate /
FELLING OF COCOON TO ADULTHOOD [8]
Now here is another approach to the common application essay.
On Easter Sunday in 2013, my mother went into coma and passed away a day after. Shockingly, she was not ill, had no previous health issues, and was never clinically diagnosed of any sickness. My mother and my pillar: Hassana Helen, like a felled tree, surrendered to death on that Easter Monday. Looking at her body, being lowered to "mother earth," I realized how naïve I was to believe that she was infallible and that she will always be around to shepherd me. But, aroused by the echoes of the pastor's elegy; "dust to dust," I stepped into the realm of responsibility, maturity and leadership of the grown-up so uncertain. I was 15, two weeks to the start of my high school final exams, when the sad incident that suddenly split the cocoon of my childishness to expose the world of adults, occurred.
Though I assisted mom with house chores, and cleaning dishes after supper, now it was my responsibility to take care of the family. The family needed me to run the house as they seem so devastated by her death. My dad, a proud veteran of the civil war in Liberia, also fell ill and was hospitalized for several weeks. He kept mumbling with rhetoric; "Is my wife dead or is someone playing a joke on me," Knowing how much my parents loved and cared for me when I was younger, I did the essential things that bonded the family: shopping for grocery, paying bills, tracking the family budget, and assisting my sibling with their homework. Besides, I ensured that the chores were equitably shared among my siblings, which encouraged them to contribute to the running of the house. Even after my father returned from the hospital, I remained the cheerleader, motivating every member of my family with praises and encouragements. The family later joined the community in general clearing of gutters and anti-malaria campaign. The responsibility of taking care of my dad and siblings, despite having to prepare for my final school exams, rested on my lean shoulders as adulthood beckons to me.
In retrospect, my original desire for embracing adulthood was to have fun while traversing the latitude of maturity gracefully until I realized the opportunities I must forgo. Then I grumbled, not excited that I must share my study time with activities such as; shopping for grocery, cooking, and doing laundry. Not to mention, my dad who was a struggle to calm down each time he became hysterical. As the burden increases with each passing moment, I remembered how my mother always quote Benjamin Franklin's "Lost time is never found again" each she wanted me to stop procrastinating on my study. Before the tragic incident, I had planned to study hard, so as to remain focused on obtaining good grades in the nine subjects I was to be tested on at my final high school exams. Hence, the day after her interment, I left the sad event behind and focused on my future. I picked my text books and studied for seven hours daily for the next one month. My choice that day changed me, like a butterfly, from a child in his cocoon to immediate maturity. I became an adult who would mentor others to succeed no matter the challenges of life.
Undoubtedly, caring for my family that spring was challenging, yet it was an enduring leadership experience. I started this leadership lesson one afternoon, when I found a book by Robert Greenleaf titled; "Servant leadership", in my dad's library. This book taught me, among others, to always put the needs of others first, and to help people develop so that they can perform as highly as possible. The knowledge acquired from the book, molded my approach to leadership as I managed the home in daddy's absence. During this period, for instance, I did all that was necessary to make my siblings forget about the tragic loss of our mom. Sometimes I condescend to clowning, joking and fooling around, even when it was stressful doing so. On many occasions we watched mom's favorite movies; "The Apprentice" by Donald Trump. My favorite moment of all, was when I narrated my internship experience at the Nigerian Economic Summit Group to my siblings, and they giggled over many office comedies. With the death of my mom; I learnt to be composed, less selfish, and to manage my fears, a chain of actions that broke the shell of naiveté.
Considering the chain of actions in last one year, I now know the level of responsibilities, maturity and leadership expected of grownups. All the while, I believed that freedom to choose without parental guidance makes one an adult, but I have learnt that adulthood demands putting the needs and development of others before my own. The demise of my mother, though agonizing, midwife this important lesson on adulthood and revealed the adult I hope to become in college. As Freddy Adu, a Ghanaian Athlete, stressed when he said; "I think everything happens for a reason and all the things that happened, good or bad, I'm glad they did. It's made me ready for life, for adulthood."
