Mai_chan
Nov 22, 2015
Writing Feedback / TELEVISION AND ITS advantages - it's very useful device [4]
Actually I feel like your Essay is informal and out of the topic (The question )
I am not an expert on correcting essays but here goes nothing .
In conclusion, television are useful devices for many reasons . People watch television for entertaining in free time or break periods. Adults can gain information on what's happening in their society or world by watching some news reports.Advertisement between each TV programs can introduce new products to viewers for better purchasing.
I think you can just improve this conclusion by adding more details and supporting ideas to get a better answer for that questions .
hope this could help -.-
Sincerely,
Mai_chan
Actually I feel like your Essay is informal and out of the topic (The question )
I am not an expert on correcting essays but here goes nothing .
In conclusion, television are useful devices for many reasons . People watch television for entertaining in free time or break periods. Adults can gain information on what's happening in their society or world by watching some news reports.Advertisement between each TV programs can introduce new products to viewers for better purchasing.
I think you can just improve this conclusion by adding more details and supporting ideas to get a better answer for that questions .
hope this could help -.-
Sincerely,
Mai_chan