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Posts by sidchilling
Name: Siddharth Saha
Joined: Dec 2, 2015
Last Post: Jan 4, 2016
Threads: 2
Posts: 3  
From: India
School: NIT Rourkela, India

Displayed posts: 5
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sidchilling   
Jan 4, 2016
Writing Feedback / The recognized greatness of a political leader is coming from his ability to take up the challenges [2]

The essay is very generic. There are no concrete examples and nothing which you have related to. Your essay looks like a combination of generic statements.

I suggest you write afresh. Make up a structure before writing --
- 1st Paragraph -- Introduction as to what you think about the prompt. Explain why. Perhaps, all the paragraphs of your current essay can be concised to form a 4 line introduction.

- 2nd Paragraph -- Find an example of a politician and how s/he demonstrated the idea in the prompt.
- 3rd Paragraph -- Another example of a politician.
- 4th Paragraph (if required) -- A one or two line conclusion.

The essay would be very good if for each example you can describe one experience of that politician -- that will provide real meat to the essay.

Hope this was useful. Looking forward to reading your revised essay.
sidchilling   
Jan 3, 2016
Undergraduate / Intellectual vitality. Does the core of the essay reflect what Stanford is looking for? [6]

Hey, in my humble opinion, you just removed a few details. You need to be more specific, the essay prompt asks you to describe one idea or experience. What you are offering is this -- "I received a computer for free, learned a few programming languages". Does this describe how you got an interest in computer science. Stanford would need more, much more.

I suggest you write this essay from scratch. Avoid platitudes and contradictions, like such --

- "As I booted up the system, everything was familiar". If everything was familiar, then what's the big deal? This is an example of a contradiction, you are basically telling them that there was nothing new with this experience.

- "what was more possible with the (superfluous word) (superfluous word) computer" ---> "more possible" is wrong. So, what was more possible? You ask a question and you didn't answer what you discovered or found. These are platitudes -- something which is a generic statement without any significance to your story or yourself, personally.

- You found a wealth of knowledge, then why did you learn programming? What got you interested?

I think you need a whole different story or better this by giving concrete examples. In my opinion, you should write a fresh essay and not edit. You can still keep the essay topic the same but writing it afresh, with the above things in mind, will improve your essay drastically.

Good luck! Producing a Stanford essay takes lot of time. Don't give up.
sidchilling   
Jan 3, 2016
Scholarship / The song "Win" by Brian McKnight is about hope, faith, and perseverance - and it expresses who I am [2]

If you could choose one song that expresses who you are, what is it and why? (250 words maximum)

The song Win by Brian McKnight is about hope, faith, and perseverance - hope that one will someday win, faith in oneself to win, and perseverance as the means to win.

When I could not clear IIT-JEE, an engineering entrance examination, I was disappointed in myself for I had worked hard towards that goal. However, I told myself that I could "weather the storm" and made full use of my college education. The perseverance paid off and I was among the first five people in my class to get a job during the campus placements. The "never say die" attitude guided me towards the "win".

The song talks about failure that I strongly relate to. When I had to shut down operations of my venture RideApp, everything looked bleak. This song lifted up my spirits by reinforcing an ever important message - that failure is just falling, that it's not permanent failure, and that I should "just get up and try again". Picking myself up, I started working on TalentMatch. Although TalentMatch didn't work out, I have not lost hope and faith. I believe, as the song says, "there still a ways to go" - there are new directions to explore and new things to do. I believe in myself and "whatever it takes, I know I'll never quit".

I resonate with the core message of the song that "now is the time" to work towards my goals, which I will achieve "someday, somehow".

Number of words: 244
sidchilling   
Jan 3, 2016
Undergraduate / Intellectual vitality. Does the core of the essay reflect what Stanford is looking for? [6]

I think that you should focus more that one experience rather than telling anything generic.

- The last paragraph looks like a conclusion with platitudes. I would suggest that you keep the entire word-limit for developing the experience which is specific to you.

- Furthermore, the experience ended without a clear lesson - how did this experience demonstrate your intellectual development. A clear and concrete achievement could make the story complete. Perhaps, something that you did with that, rather immediate, which was of some value to you or someone else.

- Timelines. When did this happen in your life? This is important -- a person in the 10th class doing this weighs differently from a person in the 5th class.

- Some technical words can be removed -- pentium 4-m, hardware (machine?).

- Get rid of the "family computer" thing -- confused me a little, also I don't think that information carries importance here.

The topic is good -- getting a computer early on in life (if you are from a developing nation - I'm Indian) can be hugely advantageous. Perhaps you can talk about programming, things you learned on the internet, what you thought of the internet as a tool of the future -- point being, you need to have some more details in the story.

Hope to read your revised essay soon!
sidchilling   
Dec 2, 2015
Graduate / The Sun Club for students at my undergraduate institute formed with support from Sun Microsystems. [2]

Describe your most significant extra-curricular activity.

The Sun Club was a student club at my undergraduate institute formed with support from Sun Microsystems. Sun Microsystems ran a program wherein they chose student Campus Ambassadors in engineering colleges across India to evangelise Sun Microsystems' products, such as NetBeans, Glassfish, and OpenSolaris, among engineering students.

When I was in my sophomore year at college, Sun Microsystems selected a student from the third year to be the Campus Ambassador. The campus ambassador's job was to form a student club on campus. For this, interviews were held by the campus ambassador and a project manager from Sun Microsystems. More than sixty sophomores and third-year students appeared for the interviews out of which six students were selected and I was one of them. The Sun Club mainly focused on seminars and talks on the various Sun technologies by the campus ambassador. During the first year of the club, my job was to market the events among students and ensure we had a decent turnout at each of our events. To accomplish this, I ran email campaigns, designed and put up advertisements on hostels' notice boards, and spoke with small gatherings in common rooms in hostels. In these advertisements, I portrayed how these technologies would help the students secure and succeed in their jobs if they were to join a software firm.

However, the turnout in our events was only satisfactory with about twenty people attending the seminars and most of the audience comprised of M.Tech students. My personal objective was to lure B.Tech students to attend the events as I was of the opinion that learning these technologies would be useful during campus placements. Later, I realised that the topics of the seminars were too advanced which made it difficult for B.Tech students to connect with the material. To solve the problem, I decided to step up and designed a complete course on the Java programming language. The Java programming language was one of the most popular during the time and much sought after by recruiters. I then organised and presented a series of tutorials - a mix of seminars and hands-on practical sessions. The Java tutorial series immediately connected with students as they were able to perceive the short-term value of the course and consequently the number of attendees for these series easily exceeded a hundred every time. In addition to sophomores and third-year students, it was exhilarating to find a number of freshmen attending the series.

In my third year at college, I was selected to be the campus ambassador and lead the activities of the Sun Club. After achieving decent success in the first year of operations, we decided to up the ante. For this, I interviewed and inducted ten more students from among sophomores and first-year students. In addition to restarting the Java tutorial series again, I started planning more advanced topics related to web development using Sun technologies. These took the form of making small teams of three to four students which worked together on individual projects such as a library management system, a classroom attendance system, and an inter-LAN movies distribution system. Given the bustling activity at the campus, I was able to convince Sun Microsystems to fund some of our activities in the form of prize money and books on the technologies. Using those as prizes, I conducted quarterly programming contests which was attended by not only our students but also students from other engineering colleges in town.

One of Sun Club's major achievements was unanimously changing the dominant programming language used by students for their assignments. During the first version of the Java tutorial series, I convinced the administration to allow us to install Sun technologies in one of our computer laboratories. As interest in the programming language grew, students stopped submitting assignments in the programming languages which were recommended by professors and switched to using Java. This change was so noticeable that the head of the department asked the Sun Club to equip computers in all the laboratories in the computer science department with Java and NetBeans.

The association with the Sun Club is undoubtedly the most enriching experience I had in college. Not only the deep friendships that I made with the members of the club but also our impact on the employability of students as was visible during the campus placements made this experience special for me. Just before graduating, I organised an open pizza party sponsored by the Sun Club which was attended by over two hundred students from freshmen to the graduating class and it was heartening to narrate and relive the journey with hoots and applauses from the Sun Club Community.
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