Undergraduate / 'volunteering to distribute christmas gifts' - what will you contribute essay [8]

Thank you guys !! could you please help me with this one

Why do want to attend UBC

Economics has been always a subject I enjoyed the most since I was young. Practically all my life, I have questioned topics related to unemployment and recession until I fully understand them, and Economics allows me to develop my investigative persona.UBC would be a perfect place for to pursue my economic studies as well as shape my perspective of life.Its unique open curriculum would provide me the opportunities to do more independent research that I never was able to do due core requirement of my current college.UBC's location will increase the chance for me to receive internship as well as volunteering opportunity.Additionally, UBC extensive study abroad programs ( especially in French-speaking countries would give me the choice to broaden my education including perspectives from a completely different part of the world and allow to become a stronger, individual leader in my community.

Undergraduate / 'volunteering to distribute christmas gifts' - what will you contribute essay [8]

thank you guys :) this is my revision , any feed backs are more than welcome:)

we live in a world in which young people living in poverty face gross inequalities and injustice.From poor education to poor nutrition to vulnerable and unemployment, the sequence of problems that young people from lower income family account are totally unacceptable but too common.

As ....student, I strongly believe that everyone should have a good quality of education regardless their family background.Being the president of initiative poverty club at my high school was totally an eye-opening for me, it taught me that education should not be taken for granted rather we should all fight for those who does not have it. As a perceptive student of .... university, I am planning to join Yclub. Being an active member of this Yclub would be an opportunity for me to but into practice the skills and knowledge I gained from my initiative poverty club.I strongly believe that tackling issues related to poor quality education could eventually change the world economy, thus, my contribution will not stop only in this club but I will continue to raise an awareness related to this issue to my fellows students who are not a part of this club.

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Undergraduate / 'mazes of monitors, wires, and other computer paraphernalia' - Why did I choose my major? [3]

in your last paragraph maybe you should say how you will use the knowledge you gain in computer and economic to resolve worldwide problems...
you should be more specific on how the future generation will benefit from your dream and why do you think that is relevant to create a tech start up .