Posts by prasanthbab

prasanthbab

Feb 24, 2017

Scholarship / Self-introduction Essay For KGSP 2017 _ At the doorstep of my dreams [3]

@eiriashhar

I found few issues in your writing.

1. Organizing the sentence with effective vocabulary.

2. Punctuation usage (you used contractions which is not correct way to write an essay)

3. Try to paraphrase with good vocabulary even I have the same issue but I am trying to improve by ready and writing, so practice Complex and Compound complex sentence with given topic.

4. I found few repetitions as well like" I am eager"

5. Coherence i.e every sentence should be continuation of previous sentence but it was not incorporated in your essay.

prasanthbab

Feb 24, 2017

Writing Feedback / A lot of technological enhancements have taken place in developing societies [6]

Early technological developments VS recent technological developments -- task 2 IELTS [3] ✓

Hi Holt thanks for your prompt analysis on my essay writing.

As per your conclusion if I can paraphrase my introduction, Body 2 and conclusion i can get good score . If possible can you give some tips to paraphrase these paragraphs that will be much helpful.@sehatdinati

Thank you very much for your advise, I will follow your guidelines next time.

prasanthbab

Feb 20, 2017

Writing Feedback / A lot of technological enhancements have taken place in developing societies [6]

Any new technological development in the recent years is a boon or curse for the society in general

new technology - a blessing or a threat?

Science and technology have great influence on human life since their inception. A lot of technological enhancements have taken place in the developing society, and which are conspicuously affecting people's life. Considering this, some analysts argue that technology is improving our life, while, others think it is creating problems. This essay focuses on some pros and cons of technological advancements and asserts the appropriate conclusion.

To begin, technology has made our life very comfortable. It is clear that computers these days are so efficient and easy to use for people that they become a part of their life. Furthermore, with the advent of electronic communication world has become a global village. For instance, VOIP technology helps people to do face-to-face conversation with their kin and kith anytime. Moreover, technology enhances the students interest and intimacy towards their studies. They can watch recorded video tutorials to clear their concepts in any field. Also, medical discoveries occur at a much more rapid rate; thanks to machines and computers that aid in the research process and allow for more intense educational research into medical matters.

On the other hand, technology also brings some threats to people. Firstly, the inventions of weapons especially nuclear war gadgets are extremely dangerous for the existence of the entire life forms on the Earth. Secondly, an increased use of motor vehicles causes the contamination of the environment which eventually causes certain problems such as rise in a surface temperature and global warming. Lastly, companies that depend heavily on computer systems to conduct business can come to a virtual standstill if the system breaks down.

To conclude, I pen down saying that, the advantages of technologies outweigh disadvantages. However, as every garden has some weeds, higher authorities must take appropriate steps to reduce its negative effects.