Scholarship / 'to become fluent in this beautiful and unique language' - KGSP 2017 STUDY PLAN FOR LANGUAGES [3]

Once more I come to ask your feedback for one essay of mine. Thank you deeply.

Study plans to improve foreign languages(Korean, English, etc) required for taking a bachelor's degree course
BEFORE and AFTER you come to Korea.

I have always been a big lover of foreigner languages as they were for me a pass to know more about other places and gather knowledge I do not possess access to due to the idiom barrier.

The first language I ever challenged myself to learn and dedicate myself to was English. I had complete knowledge that knowing this worldwide idiom would bring me countless benefits, including studying abroad. Like this, being motivated my English teacher and my mother due to my facility with the languages pointed out by them, I started reading and writing in English on a daily basis. In less than five years of studies, in which the first two were only the basic offered by school, I can now consider English as my second language. This fact makes me extremely proud of myself and my achievement, in my view it's not very common to become fluent on an idiom by self-taught when you do not have direct contact with native speakers for example; this shows me how hard I worked during these years to develop my abilities and go beyond my own limits.

Even having friends from overseas, I never had the opportunity to have a daily life in another country which main idiom was English so I believe living in Korea and meeting other international students will also help me to communicate better in my second language when it comes to the speech and pronunciation of the words so I can improve it. However, once I am thirsty for new cultures, I always desired to learn at very least two more idioms and Korean is the one I am most passionate and fascinated about in the last 4 years.

Due to my unconditional admiration and respect for the Korean culture I am applying for this scholarship to also learn and

become fluent in this beautiful and unique language, which captivates me in various ways. The desire to acquire my bachelor's degree in South Korea, adding to the interest and love I possess for the country became a great incentive to learn how to read, speak and write in Korean.

I have already started my Korean language studies by my own and I have a basic level in the moment, I can read and speak simple sentences besides knowing the basic grammar and levels of formality, which I plan developing more before leaving to Korea, to help me in daily conversations. However I am still a beginner and I believe I have so much more to learn and this one-year the Government offers to study and improve my proficiency in this country's tongue is exceptional and I look forward to this chance. Being immerse in the culture and being able to communicate well to explore different paths is essential in my view on this scholarship. I am sure that after having the Korean language as my third idiom, the future ahead of me will be fantastic and full of experiences and new chances during the five years and after receiving the bachelor's degree. Knowing the language of a country as Korea who has a strong connection with my own, Brazil, will provide success and a differential when I enter in the employment market, other than giving me a self-satisfaction immensurable, which I can blindly assure you.

I also believe it will help me to see more about the world around me, to learn even more from other people's eyes, exchanging opinions and ideas, especially when my desired course needs a brainstorming the entire time. Meeting new people who can bring me a vast range of ideas is sincerely something I desire deeply.

Entering in contact with a world that is probably the opposite of mine due to its culture, would be of great utilization in my life, adding much more to my academic years and my perspective for my career and personal life besides being the realization of a life time dream.

Scholarship / KGSP 2017 Personal Statement Review of Grammar and Topics! [3]

Hello everyone, this is my first time using essayforum.com!
This is my Personal Statement for the KGSP 2017! If someone could correct and give me a feedback about what I can change would be sincerely great! It's urgent!!!!

- Motivations ...
- Personal background ...
- Significant experiences ...
- Extracurricular activities ...
- If applicable, describe awards you have received...

Happiness of an individual is not simply about the goal one sets to them; also it's not about how successful you were when such goal was achieved. More than the final result, I believe that happiness is the path you walk through and how you absorb all the experiences, memories and lessons seeing it as a way to grow up as a human being of value and good heart to a society. I believe you can be happy in the process of achieving something.

In the year of 2012 I first read about the Korean Government Scholarship Program, back then I was 14 to 15 years old and yet my admiration for Korea was already being developed, I thought that this Scholarship was not made for me and to speak sincerely, not even I knew why this thought came across my mind. However as I grew up, the importance of a bachelor's degree knocked on my door and the KSGP opportunity appeared again in front of me. My desire to study abroad, before only a dream because my family's financial situation is not good enough could bloom again together with springtime. The high level education in Korea matches the high quality universities and the campus structures, without mentioning the field I desire is very valued in this country - the media field. I want to be able to develop my skills in a country that completes my view and opinion about my career and its needs, besides being able to grow as a person who has a wide view of the world filled with experiences and KGSP offers what I have been looking for since I chose my career in the Film and Video field.

As a child, I was reference in my class for being a good student, being active inside and outside the classroom. I would read more than my friends and have my homework done without having my parents supervising me; I have always been very responsible when education was the matter. In 2011 when I was 14 years old I tried a place on Etec - Professor Pedro Leme Brisolla Sobrinho (Technical and High School studies), over 200 students made the exam and I was in 32th place, without having entered in contact with Biology, Physics or Chemistry that were required on the test, being ahead the others 12 colleagues from the same Elementary School and in between the 20% of the students who got the highest score. However my academic years in Secondary School were not the most brilliant and exceptional someone could witness due to the fact after spending one year in the school cited previously, I had a rough time moving to another city and going through more two different institutions, totaling three schools in three years. All of them were very serious and demanding with their students, I had countless teachers in the public school that were also teachers in private institutions and even in private colleges, making the schools very competitive. Having to adapt fast to their different subjects was a challenge to me.

During those years, both in childhood and adolescence I have received full support from both my parents. Although they got divorced when I was a kid, my father would always be present to say how I should dedicate my time studying so I could follow the career I wanted, building my character with morals and values. My mother also seeing I had ability with foreigner languages incentivized me to study English (which I did, I studied during 3 years on a daily basis and the result is my proficiency exam) and follow my dreams to wherever they would lead me to, raising me to be an independent and responsible person capable of dealing with problems easily, trying to see the best way to solve it and not simply hide the difficulty. They awaken on me the desire to prove myself and to overcome my own limits every day.

Thanks to all their support, in the last semester of my last year of High School I decided I would join one of the technical courses that my school offered; my choice was Administration. I passed the entrance exam and during the one year and half of this technical course I developed my leadership, knowledge in the field and provided me countless new experiences such as working as a voluntary on the school's canteen. I was also able to participate in a project of inclusion of students in companies and being admitted on the academic secretary of a very renowned college in my city in the year of 2015, opening my vision about what higher education is and how important it can be for an individual's development. Honorably, due to my studies I was between the top 20% of my class. It was a very important event; I can say it was when I finally stepped out my comfort zone, acquiring experience in the job market.

As for extracurricular activities I already performed choreographies for dance projects and was a part of the volleyball team of my school from when I was 12 to 14 years old actively going to competitions. Right now I am a volunteer at a Social Program for low classes' children called 'Nocaija' from the city I live in, during around 4 hours per week I aid the monitors and play with the children, I also record and take photos of these kids to the current and future partnerships with big companies.

For this I can securely say I am constantly taking risks, last year I was accepted on the IFSP (Federal Institute of Sao Paulo, in Brazil) for Biology Sciences, which is a big achievement for me and my family, since a public university is very appreciated in my country. I am gaining experience and knowledge in there plus in there I am a part of a project in which I help a teacher developing the Biology studies for High School teenagers; during 20 hours per week, helping them with the subject, works and much more. However I am not satisfied with this, I want more, I want to challenge myself, being immerse in another culture, understand how the world out there works and more importantly, leave the comfort box I am trying to leave for the past years. I believe that this Scholarship can allow me to set free for new experiences and memories and finally enroll on the bachelor I aim for.

I have received a lot of praises by my professors; they always told me I was capable, intelligent, smart and creative so I have built a strong connection with them, they inspire me deeply. While I was attempting last year to this same Scholarship, because of financial unexpected problems, I was having an incredible hard time, I ended up seeking guidance from my then School Principal and we talked about my worries, she said: "If you don't pass this time, what is the matter? There's always tomorrow to try, isn't there? You only truly fail when you stop trying, haven't you heard?" And when I did not pass, another teacher of mine aware of the situation advised "Just don't give up. I don't want you to give up on your dream." This made me realize that life is seriously made of up and downs, that failure is not about when you do not achieve something but when you stop trying to. Now I know this Scholarship is yes suited for me, I believe I am prepared to take the fullest from what it can give to me because in the process of achieving my University Degree I will be able to find happiness.

Thank you for the honorable opportunity.

I am worried there are "too many feelings" on it... But it is what I feel inside... It's my dream after all. What you guys think? Also should I take off my "thank you" at the end?

Thank you everyone for reading!!!