mimemeow
Dec 5, 2016
Writing Feedback / IELTS writing task 2: too much exercises is bad for one's health, do u agree or disagree? [3]
This is my first essay of task 2 in IETLS writing part. I need your help to find my improving points in writing skill. Thank you a lot for reading this. :)
Too much exercises is bad for one's health, do u agree or disagree with this statement?
The health benefit of regular exercise and physical activities are hard to ignore but it is impossible to argue against the fact that doing too much exercises also hold unexpected dangers.
First and foremost, too much exercises have negative impact on their physic health. Especially, the damage will be more and more grave if they do exercise in a wrong way that lead to the muscle pain. As well as this, heart needs to work harder to pump blood to their brain. This is mainly because human body has limits and when they heart can't respond anymore, can cause negative effect, their body probably fall into a coma which is also a main reason of heart disease. For example, there are people, who choose to run as much as possible as a way of losing weight, but the result is that, they will possibly take all of these damages above or even die.
Futhermore, the problem is not only badly impact on physic health but also cause serious mental health problem. For instance, being exhausted from getting out of breath, people will lose motivation to run their daily life. This mean that, productivity would certainly decline. Consequenly, too much exercises waste time and excessive consumption of one's energy, which can contribute to a poor health.
In conclusion, I personally believe that the more doesn't mean better, it is wise for people if they decide to do exercise at a suitable intensity, which can brings the best result of working out.
This is my first essay of task 2 in IETLS writing part. I need your help to find my improving points in writing skill. Thank you a lot for reading this. :)
Too much exercises is bad for one's health, do u agree or disagree with this statement?
The health benefit of regular exercise and physical activities are hard to ignore but it is impossible to argue against the fact that doing too much exercises also hold unexpected dangers.
First and foremost, too much exercises have negative impact on their physic health. Especially, the damage will be more and more grave if they do exercise in a wrong way that lead to the muscle pain. As well as this, heart needs to work harder to pump blood to their brain. This is mainly because human body has limits and when they heart can't respond anymore, can cause negative effect, their body probably fall into a coma which is also a main reason of heart disease. For example, there are people, who choose to run as much as possible as a way of losing weight, but the result is that, they will possibly take all of these damages above or even die.
Futhermore, the problem is not only badly impact on physic health but also cause serious mental health problem. For instance, being exhausted from getting out of breath, people will lose motivation to run their daily life. This mean that, productivity would certainly decline. Consequenly, too much exercises waste time and excessive consumption of one's energy, which can contribute to a poor health.
In conclusion, I personally believe that the more doesn't mean better, it is wise for people if they decide to do exercise at a suitable intensity, which can brings the best result of working out.