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I am an intelligent hard worker. Readmission Letter.



snapbacks 1 / -  
Jul 29, 2019   #1

becoming a shocker



I started school in the spring of 2015, at that time it was both a tragic and exciting time for me. One of my really close friends had passed away a few days prior and I couldn't really understand my emotions at the time. I didn't really realize how much of an impact that had on me until I was two states away and on my own. This was my first time living by myself with no family around, no real friends and it was an extremely difficult transition for me with all that was going on in such a short amount of time. I appealed a couple of years back because I was doing so bad and in hindsight I should have taken a break from school to reflect on my life and my goals and to refocus on what was in front of me but my naiveté allowed me to keep going and it wasn't the best decision. Being given another opportunity, I still did not prioritize my schoolwork, disregarding my accountability and consequently, failed to achieve the required grades and was academically dismissed.

After being out of school for 3 semesters, I feel I am ready to take on this responsibility and focus on my studies. I have realized that if I am to reach my goals of becoming a software developer, be respected in the field, and make my family proud, I need to have a degree in computer science. If readmitted, my schoolwork will become my priority, take on fewer workload to begin with, and study more on better time management practices. I plan to utilize the various resources the campus has to offer such as geek, SI, and other tutoring help I can acquire, as well as frequently meeting my advisor for proper guidance and any counselors to talk about my mind state in case any problems like before occur again. Dedicate at least 2 hours for each class I take everyday to studying and homework. I will read my books ahead of class to better understand the lectures, frequent the library, also utilize my teachers and fellow classmates as much as possible to ensure my understanding of the topics covered.

One thing I have learned since being dismissed is being a a man of my own is the result of hard work and dedication, something I didn't completely comprehend. I am older now with a better understanding of how the world works and how I need to have a responsible mindset. My dismissal is not a reflection of my intelligence or work ethic, just my vulnerability. I hope the board can consider my request to be reinstated as it would not only make me happy but would make my family happy as well who have been going through rough times recently. Thank you for considering and I hopefully look forward to becoming a shocker again.

Is this a good enough readmission letter to submit?

Maria - / 1096  
Jul 29, 2019   #2
@snapbacks
Hello there! Welcome to the forum. I hope to provide you with substantive writing feedback for your essay.

First and foremost, while I think that you were able to pour in your emotions on the text on the first paragraph, I highly suggest trying to make concise this portion of your essay. Try to appeal with more depth rather than overexplaining the situation.

I would also recommend trying to balance out your text. Notice how the second paragraph had a vacuum of your admission of what you will do if you would be readmitted back to the university. I suggest trying to, for example, adding more of submission to your own personal responsbility in the first paragraph.

I wish you the best of luck in your readmission!


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