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Draft Essay: Undertstanding the Average Teenager



esmi_10 1 / -  
Jul 8, 2016   #1
While living in the moment and having imagination of what our life should be like, it's confusing to be a teenager. Our period of time makes us who we are. What we see, what we do, and what we experience impacts us of who to be. Our views on our future, the world, and roles in our lives depend on how we grow up and reflect on our past decisions and mistakes. Before we become adults and step into the scary world, we must live life with happiness and success to our best ability. The struggles, the heart breaks, and the control of rules and boundaries come in and test our experience to see if we fail or succeed. A parent can play a bigger role in a teenager's life by helping and understanding them emotionally, managing responsibilities in life and guiding them through middle and high school life.

First, a parent can play a bigger role in a teenager's life by helping and understanding them emotionally. What is generally said about teenagers? A teenager is from the ages 12-18. We rebel, do bad things, experience and do what we want. They never listen to what anybody says, they don't acknowledge or respect elders in their life, and they're always in their own world, etc. only bad and typical things are said about us. Some teenagers go past the reputation and become good for themselves because of how good they were raised or of their choice.

A teenager is hard to manage, once we go through puberty or ask questions about everything we tend to go on our own for better or worse. What we experience, bad or good, we become emotional. We deal with anger, happiness, frustration, stress, worry, and wonder, etc. honestly, anything can trigger a nerve that puts us in a mood. Depending on what we deal with emotionally, it can ruin us or heal us. Everything becomes different with experience. "We go through things" (Nancy). Teenagers take advantage of what is presented to them and learn from it. There's a lot in to understanding our behavior, which sometimes can't really be explained. We past our judgement, give in to our impulse control or pay attention to what is new or different. Also, we observe everything along with gaining new knowledge of what we have to do in life and where our role is placed. A parent's role is to pay attention to us to make sure we are okay with ourselves, life and with them.

Second, a parent can play a bigger role in a teenager's life by helping us manage our responsibilities. Responsibilities like school, school work, sport or club calendar, friends, relationships, or ourselves. Taking care of ourselves is a huge responsibility, along with school and relationships. Often times it's not comfortable to come across a teenager that isn't responsible of anything, otherwise we would put them down as a person or for what they haven't had accomplished yet.

People want well in life, a person that is responsible and that we don't have to babysit all the time to make sure they're doing the right thing. Parents should be able to look at their teenager or other teenagers and have some reliability or trust in a situation. Parents want to live life with less of a struggle, it would be a pleasure to have knowledge that their child can take care of a situation, while parents have important tasks to do as well. A parent should be a sole role model on how to manage the important aspects in life like knowing right from wrong in a situation, responsible with bills, putting food in the fridge or paying funds on time or of what is needed.

We see what parents do in our life, we hear and deal with what needs to happen first before the fun. Teenagers have to keep with their grades to get a good GPA, turn in assignments on time, that's a responsibility. It can also be a responsibility for a parent to check up on homework and see how they're doing. In school we have to make sure we communicate with the teachers, play safe in sports, get to games on time and attend clubs with accurate participation. Also, we need to keep up with the types of relationships we have in our lives, to make us feel social, included and happy. "It's a responsibility to stay healthy throughout the day and get an average to 8-6 hours" (Math Goodies). Being a teen is every step to preparing for the adult life, or being like our parents. With responsibilities and the right guidance, comes a good life.

Lastly, a parent can play a bigger role in a teenager's life by guiding them through middle and high school life. Those 7 years of a teenager's life are the worst. While going through puberty we have to deal with every step of every year going to and completing high school. Being a teenager, high school can or will be scarier than middle school for some people. Our reputation is built, choices are being made and offered and opportunities for different experiences approach. Teenagers see new things in school, a parent's role is to make sure the teenagers lives their life with less risk or danger.

"Parents must learn to take time with their teenagers because it could prevent the bad choices like teenage pregnancy, drug or alcohol abuse or bad outcomes" (Nancy). A tip a parent should always remember is to guide their child the right way and manage their behavior of what they do know and hope for their child to prevent. A parent would want to guide their teenager on how to behave the average way because they have to worry how other people would see their child. Not that most parents would care of others opinions on raising their children, but it eventually takes a toll because that kind of attitude doesn't look good for anyone.

Other adult's see how we act, and see what role the parent has in our life. Likewise, we work for different adults that determine if it's worth hiring us or not, and also we have to deal with the supportive adults or jerk adults in our lives. Parents choose to guide us in managing our struggles and accomplishments and tasks that need to be done. A parent's role is huge because teenagers look up to their parents whether they make the right or wrong decisions. A parent shapes an ideal person for us to be. The work really depends on us, but the effort of a parent motives us. We build relationships with different people to experience different things. People come and go in our life, they either make us happy, or ruin us bit by bit. All aspects of a teenager come in a package to understand, but it's all very simple if parents leap a big effort to be a part of our lives.

In conclusion, a parent can play a bigger role in teenager's life by guiding us through middle and high school life, managing responsibilities and understanding us emotionally. As said before, it's hard to manage a teenager. We have ambition, curiosity and the idea to explore and know everything. But the ultimate goal in life for a teenager is to live a successful and happy life. We are guided and built for every step in our life. The adult world is what we prepare ourselves for, in all that we get an understanding of ourselves and who we have to be in order to live the adult life smoothly, but which adult does? We learn every step if the way, and along come experiences. Our goal is get out of the chaos of what being a teenager brings to us and build our own chaos that we can handle. We want to satisfy life and achieve of what comes, but in our own terms. With a teenager, comes a lot of responsibility because we are on mood swings that can turn a person crazy. Adults know how to deal with us, or as they say because they've been through it. Even if that's said, an adult doesn't really understand but can come to that by simply asking. We are viewed by the way we present ourselves and the way to complete this stage is to go along and accept the guidance that is offered because we surely can't do everything ourselves.

ichanpants89 16 / 742  
Jul 8, 2016   #2
Hi Esmeralda, welcome to the team! :) I can see that you have posted additional sentence into separated thread. I suggest you to delete that thread because it will cause a direct suspension from the moderator. You need to be careful next time. However, with regards to your essay, I would like to point out some of your weaknesses with hope that you can strengthen your research paper later on. I hope my feedback would be useful towards your writing development.

- Contractions like "It's/haven't/isn't" and many more should not be appeared in academic essay, especially a research paper. It can only be used in informal situation or condition, perhaps in informal letter or in spoken situation. Therefore, you should avoid using them.

- I have written several research essays without using personal pronouns. As I said earlier, a research essay is an academic piece of work. Thus, personal pronouns like "we/us/our/I/you" should not be used. It will only make the essay become less formal. Your essay has some personal pronouns that can be altered into third-person point of view. For instance, you can change "we" > "people", "I" > "The writer/researcher", "I" > "he/she", and many other options available for these.

- Citation or quotation like this "Parents must learn to take time with their teenagers because it could prevent the bad choices like teenage pregnancy, drug or alcohol abuse or bad outcomes" (Nancy). should be clear. You need to write the year and the page of her/his book (if possible), for example (Nancy, 2009:2) which means Nancy in 2009 page 2. Moreover, you also need to write your references in the last part after the last paragraph in order to avoid plagiarism.

There you have it Esmeralda, I hope you can follow through the feedback. Good luck in revising this research paper. Please do not hesitate to ask if you need further assistance :)
justivy03 - / 2265  
Jul 21, 2016   #3
Hi Esmi, I hope my insights are not too late. First of all, once again, WELCOME to the team! This website has been serving the best of us and made each and every feedback and as much as valuable to your writing projects as possible. We never fail to provide you with the most accurate and credible criticism in order to guide you in discovering different writing techniques and hone your skills in this great craft.

Now, as I read through and review your essay, I can't help but notice the length of the essay, I'm not sure if you are following a certain word count restriction or you just want to elaborate your thought on the task at hand. However, I like that fact that you manage to keep the essay smooth, each and every paragraph has a continuous idea from the previous one ad this is very important, this is where your readers will draw the overall picture of the essay.

Furthermore, I believe you can still keep your presentation, when it comes to the numbers of the paragraphs, make it a maximum of 4 paragraphs, not by deleting any of the paragraphs but by merging the paragraphs, I suggest this because, sometimes, the length affects the interest of the readers towards reading and understanding your essay. As mentioned, overall, the essay has clearly depicted your thoughts and ideas on the task at hand. Keep writing.


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