IETLTS Task 1; Charts on Adult Edcuation / Reasons & Attitudes regarding cost sharing

The chart shows there are at least seven common reasons for adult to back to school. Total of 161 people voted their opinions. Personal interests in subject has the most fans among them, the number is twice as much as the group who wanted to improve prospects of promotion or enjoy learning(both are 20 people). Followed by 38 people of the group whose purpose for continuing education is to gain professional qualification while others 2LS

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Hey! That's a good essay, just a few suggestions:
"for an adult to go back to school" insdead of "for adult to back to school"
I think "a total of 161 people expressed their opinions" is a better way to say "vote"
delete "among them"
"this catogary" is followed by 38 people

Looks good but i also agree with Sifan's suggestions to change those couple parts

Hey Sifan and Scott,

Great thanks. I just found out there were some mistake when I posted this article. Combining with the comments from both of your post, here comes the revised version.

The chart shows there are at least seven common reasons for an adult to back to school. Total of 161 people expressed their opinions. Personal interests in subject has the most fans, the number is twice as much as the group who wanted to improve prospects of promotion or enjoy learning(both are 20 people). Followed by the secondlist reason of continuing education which there has 38 people agreeed their purpose is to gain professional qualification while others 22 adults think it is helpful their current job. Very few adult, the least 9 people prefer to explore their network by meeting people in the classroom.

From the pie chart we can see that 40% of the costs for each course should be shared by individually, while the rest part of the costs should be divided to both the taxpayer and employer for whom adult learner are working.

A total of 161 people expressed their opinions.

Personal interests in subject has the most fans, because the number is twice as much as the group who wanted to improve ...

They are followed by the second largest reason for continuing education, which had 38 people who agreed that their purpose was to gain professional qualification. Twenty-two adults think it is helpful in their current job.

Very few adults, the group with only 9 people, preferred to explore their network by meeting people in the classroom.

:- ) This kind of writing is hard!