Biographical Essay (800 word limit)
We are interested in learning more about you and the context in which you have grown up, formed your aspirations and accomplished your academic successes. Please describe the factors and challenges that have most shaped your personal life and aspirations. How have these factors caused you to grow?
I grew up in a family just like any other families in Saigon, Vietnam; a family that has a dad, a mom, and a brother. Those were my ten years of a full and happy life until the day gastric cancer stole my dad from me. It was a coincidence that my dad had become an orphan at the same age of me when I lost him. However, I was way luckier than him in that I still have my mom- the person who plays the most important role in my life.
My family was mainly depended on my dad's income. Soon after his disappearance, we went on a financial crisis. My mom had to work days and nights in a clothing factory with a small payment just enough to pay for foods, bills, and her sons' educations. I couldn't bear to see her coming home late, exhausted without a word of complaints. My mom has sacrificed what was supposed to be a happy life to make sure me and my brother get educated in a country where tuition fees for elementary schools are expensive, let alone colleges. There is no reason or excuse for me to disappoint her. Keeping my promise to do well in classes, I made it into top 5 students with highest academic achievements in the most one of the most selective middle school in Saigon. My very first success, together with my brother being accepted to a medical college, made my mom happier than ever.
Life is never smooth and stable like the surface of a lake. It is the ocean where waves come after waves without any cautions. Once again, my life started to change when my mom remarried, and we moved to America. In the first month, we lived with my dad's uncle and aunt who had adopted him after his parents' deaths. Everything was perfect except the frequent arguments from my dad's side not letting my step-father stay with us. My mom, with her dignity, couldn't bear living under others' control and decided to move out to live in an apartment. It is beyond horrible to be turned away by my own relatives. Life in the apartment wasn't easy for a 4-members-family whose incomes came from only my step-father. Situations like this have taught me a lot of about the value of money. Three years living in here, I've never owned a phone that is higher than thirty bucks. Despite the fact that my friends keep switching their phones from 4s to 5, and now 6, I prefer using a cheap one until the day I can make my own money.
Language barrier was the biggest challenge I've ever faced. Because of it, I lost so many friendships and opportunities to achieve more than what I had got. I wasted most of my time in freshman and sophomore year for classes I wasn't interested in at all, because they were chosen by my counselor since I was new to this American school system. I didn't even know what an "AP class" is until the end of my 10th grade. I struggled with classes as well, especially team sports. Yes it sounds ridiculous, but I actually got a "B" in my first semester of team sports for not dressing out, because I couldn't understand a single word from my coach. So I decided to concentrate more on learning English by reading books. I started with very easy ones such as "Diary of a Wimpy Kid." Though my reading skill is not perfect, I can tell that it has been improved significantly. Now, I am able to read a long novel like "Harry Potter" and understand tough articles which used to be my sleep pills. However, I realized that learning English by myself wasn't enough. I started to make new friends, join school's clubs, and try to blend in the new society to be able to master my English skills as well as the knowledge of this new culture.
Challenges are always there to attack your weakest spots. There is no way to avoid but to face them and show them that your weakest spots are now strongest ones. Losing a person I love, fighting against poverty, struggling with a new language, or being isolated didn't pull me back away from my goals. Instead, they proved me that I am stronger than I thought. I can see the challenges waiting ahead: going to college, paying for tuition fees, dealing with higher level problems... In fact, writing this essay and applying for Questbridge are something that I've been struggling with, because I knew I have more disadvantages than other students. However, I accepted the challenge anyway, because there is no loss for trying, because no matter how hard the situation is, I always have my mom by my side giving me supports and motivation.
Really appreciate if you give me some feedbacks, correction and constructions so that i can improve this essay. BTW, the total words of this essay are 809.
We are interested in learning more about you and the context in which you have grown up, formed your aspirations and accomplished your academic successes. Please describe the factors and challenges that have most shaped your personal life and aspirations. How have these factors caused you to grow?
I grew up in a family just like any other families in Saigon, Vietnam; a family that has a dad, a mom, and a brother. Those were my ten years of a full and happy life until the day gastric cancer stole my dad from me. It was a coincidence that my dad had become an orphan at the same age of me when I lost him. However, I was way luckier than him in that I still have my mom- the person who plays the most important role in my life.
My family was mainly depended on my dad's income. Soon after his disappearance, we went on a financial crisis. My mom had to work days and nights in a clothing factory with a small payment just enough to pay for foods, bills, and her sons' educations. I couldn't bear to see her coming home late, exhausted without a word of complaints. My mom has sacrificed what was supposed to be a happy life to make sure me and my brother get educated in a country where tuition fees for elementary schools are expensive, let alone colleges. There is no reason or excuse for me to disappoint her. Keeping my promise to do well in classes, I made it into top 5 students with highest academic achievements in the most one of the most selective middle school in Saigon. My very first success, together with my brother being accepted to a medical college, made my mom happier than ever.
Life is never smooth and stable like the surface of a lake. It is the ocean where waves come after waves without any cautions. Once again, my life started to change when my mom remarried, and we moved to America. In the first month, we lived with my dad's uncle and aunt who had adopted him after his parents' deaths. Everything was perfect except the frequent arguments from my dad's side not letting my step-father stay with us. My mom, with her dignity, couldn't bear living under others' control and decided to move out to live in an apartment. It is beyond horrible to be turned away by my own relatives. Life in the apartment wasn't easy for a 4-members-family whose incomes came from only my step-father. Situations like this have taught me a lot of about the value of money. Three years living in here, I've never owned a phone that is higher than thirty bucks. Despite the fact that my friends keep switching their phones from 4s to 5, and now 6, I prefer using a cheap one until the day I can make my own money.
Language barrier was the biggest challenge I've ever faced. Because of it, I lost so many friendships and opportunities to achieve more than what I had got. I wasted most of my time in freshman and sophomore year for classes I wasn't interested in at all, because they were chosen by my counselor since I was new to this American school system. I didn't even know what an "AP class" is until the end of my 10th grade. I struggled with classes as well, especially team sports. Yes it sounds ridiculous, but I actually got a "B" in my first semester of team sports for not dressing out, because I couldn't understand a single word from my coach. So I decided to concentrate more on learning English by reading books. I started with very easy ones such as "Diary of a Wimpy Kid." Though my reading skill is not perfect, I can tell that it has been improved significantly. Now, I am able to read a long novel like "Harry Potter" and understand tough articles which used to be my sleep pills. However, I realized that learning English by myself wasn't enough. I started to make new friends, join school's clubs, and try to blend in the new society to be able to master my English skills as well as the knowledge of this new culture.
Challenges are always there to attack your weakest spots. There is no way to avoid but to face them and show them that your weakest spots are now strongest ones. Losing a person I love, fighting against poverty, struggling with a new language, or being isolated didn't pull me back away from my goals. Instead, they proved me that I am stronger than I thought. I can see the challenges waiting ahead: going to college, paying for tuition fees, dealing with higher level problems... In fact, writing this essay and applying for Questbridge are something that I've been struggling with, because I knew I have more disadvantages than other students. However, I accepted the challenge anyway, because there is no loss for trying, because no matter how hard the situation is, I always have my mom by my side giving me supports and motivation.
Really appreciate if you give me some feedbacks, correction and constructions so that i can improve this essay. BTW, the total words of this essay are 809.
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