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This is my Motivation Letter for a Scholarship opportunity from DAAD



dooD /  
Nov 18, 2015   #1
I am writing this letter to request a Scholarship opportunity from DAAD. I have a passion for International Joint Master of Science in Regional Development Planning and Management, This program is a solid step towards achieving my future job as a Regional Development Planner and Manager. TU Dortmund University would be my preferred destination to study.

I completed a Bachelor Degree in Architecture and Urbanism at Royal University of Fine Arts, where is the biggest and best Higher Institution for arts in Cambodia. The five year Bachelor program formed the basis of my knowledge in my chosen area. During my studies i acquired all the essential skills of field research. Moreover I have worked diligently achieved a lot and fulfilled all of my university's study programs. Studies this field have provided me a deeper comprehension of science and its cultural influences. I am very proud that i managed to complete my studies, especially given that less than half of the 150 students who studied with me managed to complete the studies program, That was my unforgettable consequence in my life.

Due to my previous work experience, I have many projects related to Architectural Design and Regional Development, hence i would like to continue my penchant for these field. There are a few Higher Institutions that offer Bachelor in the field of Architecture and Urbanism only, there is no specific course in Regional Development Planning and Management in Cambodia. As there is a lack of native Regional Development Planners and Managers, I decided to pursue a Master Degree in this field, I personally see it is important in order for Cambodia to develop. After carefully reading the Development-Related Postgraduate Courses that DAAD are offering with your University, I believe that curricula fully suits my intentions, therefore I would like to get an opportunity to attend this Studies program.

Education is not only the factor that affects the development of a country but it affect the surrounding. Studying is very importance to me, I think everyone should have high quality of education to improve skills and abilities. I wish to study abroad because I want to boost my knowledge, likewise I would earn different education system. Cambodia is a developing and very poor country many people have a low average income. Furthermore Urbanization helps pull people out of poverty and advances progress towards Development goals I think, as a result the number of population moving to the big Cities is increasing rapidly, which leads to major problems such as Environment degradation, Transportation, Quality of life..., therefore Cambodia is in dire need of more professionals Regional Development Planners and Managers to improve.

Germany is a developed and democratic country, especially its highest Human Development Index ranks among the top of the other Countries, The Education Standard is recognized all over the world, it is the place where I most want to study, however i need a scholarship to support my studying and living expenses. DAAD is a virtuous organization that focus on Education, It has provided many benefits for Universities Students and Researchers. By choosing DAAD Scholarship is my perfect decision.

I am very keen to be a considered for DAAD Scholarship because I am optimistic about my studies in Germany. I whole heartily believe the opportunity from DAAD and TU Dortmund University. I am certain that studying in Germany will broaden my horizons and help me become an expert Human resource in order to develop my Country. Within my commitment, I am sure that I can meet all the requirements and would be able to maintain a high standard of study.

eddies [Contributor] 25 / 1170  
Nov 18, 2015   #2
- Planning and Management, (STOP HERE) This program
- The five- year Bachelor program HAS formedthe basis of my PRIOR knowledge OF inmy THE chosen area
- During my studies ( A COMMA) iI acquired
- I have worked diligently achieved a lot and fulfilled
- Studies STUDYING this field have HAS
- There are a few Higher Institutions that offer Bachelor in the field of Architecture and Urbanism only, there is no specific course in Regional Development Planning and Management in Cambodia. This part contains run-on sentences. You need to break it into two

- Education is not only the factor that affects the development of a country (A COMMA) but ALSO it affect the surrounding THE SOCIETY.
- Cambodia is a developing and very poor country WHERE many people A MAJORITY OF CITIZENS have a low- average income
yan500 4 / 10  
Nov 19, 2015   #3
where it is the biggest and best Higher Institution for arts in Cambodia.

Dood, I think this sentence needs a second look at.
OP dooD /  
Nov 20, 2015   #4
Hello @ yan500, i don't get your, can you please repeat it again with fully description.
hasdymath 11 / 20  
Nov 21, 2015   #5
pardon, I got wrong with my recently comment, here is the true one

hi dooD, reviewrs are going to think more about your interest to study in master degree, whilst you are completing it by using logical and practical method to reach some or a target.

here is my correction. be careful with capital letter.
During my studies i I acquired all the essential skills of field research.
I am very proud that i I managed to complete my studies,
and advances progress towards Development development goals I think,

Help with mine ⇒ IELTS TASK 1 : the proportion of changes in students graduated from universities in Canadian
Help with mine ⇒ IELTS TASK 1: The charts below show household spending patterns in two countries between 1980 & 2008
justivy03 - / 2265  
Nov 21, 2015   #6
Visal, before I dice up your essay, I need to figure out where to start first, you wrote or shall I say, posted you essay in the sense that I don't know where you essay starts, no paragraph segregation, no bold notes to mark the prompt and whatever is not part of the essay.

This is the first task you have to clear in order to gain EF contributors to have a look and review your work.

When you do your revision, please mind the following.

- write in clear concise manner
- know what a motivation letter is and what information you need to give out
in order to write and come up with a well written letter
- know what are the standards of the DAAD Scholarship,
this will help you find, learn and step closer to that scholarship award
- mind your letter presentation, this also matters in gaining confidence on your letter

Lastly, inject a personal insight in the final paragraph of your essay, this is always a winner.
I hope to see your revised essay posted here on EF so we can assist you further.
Clark Kent 20 / 23  
Nov 21, 2015   #7
Education is not only the major ... .

Education not only affects the country's development, but also it influences the environment. Studying is the most critical activity for me, because i need high quality of skills and abilities to improve my life and my country. I really wish able to continue my study in foreign country, because i want to broaden my knowledge, and learns new education system, so i can apply it to my country, Cambodia. As many people know, Cambodia is a developing country, and many of the inhabitants experience low revenue.


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