How will the suggested study benefit my future? - AAS Essay

How will the proposed study contribute to your career? - AAS Essay

2000 characters

My proposed course is TESOL

(Teaching English to Speakers of other Languages)

I'm not satisfied with this essay, because mainly I talk about the academic benefits. Should I talk about the professional benefits too? Help me expand it. Thank you.

The program will shape my critical thinking and skills in teaching English to future teachers. The experience will provide me plenty of insights of how English teaching should be done and give me the skills in second language acquisition theory, research and practice as well as curriculum planning principals in order to polish what I have got so far so that I can make a significant difference in English teaching. I can also use my connection from the Australian university to support research , training and teaching project with my university in the future.

@d2ny
Dany, you have only used 25% of the maximum essay size, that is way too little.
I think you should describe your career development till date (maybe, include some success story) and then show how this course will help to accelerate your career. Write about the additional value this course will bring to the experience you already possess, and how it will help you build on that experience. You could cite those academic benefits here as well.

Dany, you can improve the content of your response if you think about your post study goals. How will these studies contribute to your career? The question expects you to consider your future career goals and how the course of study you have chosen will help to equip you in this field. So you do not talk about "future expectations" but rather, discuss the outcome of the study as a contributing factor to the development of your career. Think in manners of "Graduating from this course means that I have the ability to effect change in the TESOL teaching method in my country. The improvements will stem from my new found ability to..." You need to know what direction you want to take your career in and then explain how this study supports that through performance instead of hypothetical assumptions as you do now.

@serikbar
@Holt
That is a very great input.

How about this revision? 1862 charters

At this moment, I am working as a teacher at English First Kediri whose main duty is teaching English to students who wish to improve their English proficiency. The first time I taught, I found difficulties to teach my students especially young learners because I did not have adequate skills and knowledge about it. However, as I learned from my colleagues and trainings, I have developed better.

While I am satisfied since I can implement my skills to improve my students' English, I have limitations at the moment. I cannot teach anywhere other than at English First due to my agreement with the company. That means, I cannot teach the students who are underprivileged or orphans near my community. I cannot also train other teachers except English First's because of the same issue.

Through this program, I will be able to strengthen my critical thinking and English teaching skills that I can disseminate to future teachers. The insights that I obtain from the experience can help me develop new methodologies in English teaching related to second language acquisition theory, research and practice as well as curriculum planning principals. I can use my connection from Australian universities to support research, training and teaching project with my university to improve the teaching skills of my fellow lecturers and English language proficiency of my students. This way I can contribute to enrich the practice of English teaching in Indonesia through the university where I will work and the students who later on will be English teachers after they graduate from the university. I can also help improving the teachers and students in my community through collaborations in the form of trainings, workshops and social work since it is one of lecturers responsibility as well as the aim of the universities in Indonesia, which is helping the community.

The second paragraph is irrelevant. There is no need to inform the reviewer about your employment arrangement. That is internal between you and your company. You should instead, develop the first paragraph further to help create a transition sentence, or paragraph if you wish, which will properly introduce the benefits of your studies in terms of your career and your performance of your tasks. The second paragraph needs no reworking. It is very clear and related to the prompt requirement for a response. Just focus on improving the first paragraph as that is crucial to the essay. There is actually another option if you wish to consider it. The option is, do not use the first paragraph either. Just use the second paragraph in its entirety and deliver a response statement instead of a response essay. The statement delivers a stronger message than an essay actually, so your response would result in a more professional and memorable response to the reviewer.