The World's most influential leader

Hey Fam!
Could anyone read and provide me positive feedback on my essay? Gracias!!!

chevening leadership question

Chevening is looking for individuals that will be future leaders or influencers in their home countries. Explain how you meet this requirement, using clear examples of your own leadership and influencing skills to support your answer. (minimum word count: 50 words, maximum word count: 500 words)

To achieve success at a young age is what most people aspire. However, making an impact in communities and grass root organizations has been inspirationally equally important to me. Since being elected as a student guild representative at Makerere in 2012 which shaped my vision for leadership, my professional engagements have yielded tangible achievements exemplifying collaborative leadership, inspiration and mobilization skills, adaptation and innovative thinking, self-awareness and continuous commitment to learning.

Five years ago, I organized and chaired a peer-led country panel discussion at the 3rd Women Deliver Global Conference, the most prominent Sexual Reproductive Health conference in the world that discussed causes of childbirth maternal deaths and mechanisms of alleviating the overwhelming mortality rate of 435 per 100,000 live births. I used my personal tragedy of my sister who died during childbirth in a Ugandan hospital in 2012 and became a numerator of the statistics that she often cited to emphasize the tragedy of maternal deaths. This inspired the birth of the East African Regional Caucus that focused on citizen-led action for the health and rights of women and girls. The caucus has mobilized and encouraged over 1,215 participants to urge their governments to fulfill their commitments to reproductive, maternal, newborn, child, and adolescent health, and invest resources to save the lives of women, girls, and children who die every day due to preventable deaths.

Recognizing that leadership requires continual adaptation and innovative thinking and that weathering adversity and remaining committed to goals is central to innovation as a leader. Amidst scarce funding for individual-led projects globally, in 2014, I instituted a $300,000 community micro-health insurance scheme through crowdfunding that has supported financial growth and economic resilience among 327 orphans. The program has also inspired access to Anti-Retroviral therapy for over 224 pregnant women living with HIV/AIDs in Nebbi District.

Being self-aware with a continuous commitment to learning and recognizing that leadership requires self-effacement has yielded tangible results elucidated by my passion for improving the well-being of vulnerable communities. While working for the African Union during the Ebola Outbreak in Conakry, Guinea, West Africa in 2014, I worked with the community, religious and cultural leaders to design and implement effective epidemic reduction and mitigation strategies that reduced the Incidence and prevalence of Ebola to zero in only six months. Recently, I worked with several community organizations in 25 communities to fundraise and institute 17 community health projects that have empowered over 276,000 people to gain access to healthcare.

This Essay is good because it involves your personal experience, but you have to explain how the process when you assume the role of leader. You say "leadership requires continual adaptation and innovative thinking and that weathering adversity and remaining committed to goals is central to innovation as a leader", that's very good, but you have to explain how in real life you apply those characteristics of a good leader.

Patrick, this essay is more relevant towards the networking prompt than the leadership and influencing requirements. You can save this essay for use in the networking essay but you will have to write a new essay that focuses on displaying your leadership and influencing abilities in the sense of management issues. This mean, work related discussions. Identify what your profession is. What is your position title? Do you have people who answer to you? What sort of work does your organization do? What problems do you have to deal with? Think of a particularly difficult problem that had you testing your leadership of the team and required you to influence the group or some other person or organization in order to create a successful undertaking. All of your explanations in this essay relate more as to how you run an organization based on a network such as gaining outside sponsorship or crowd funding. That is different from the leadership and influencing requirements. You may want to review the examples here in order to get a better idea as to how you can best respond to the prompt.