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Persuasive Speech for "Proposition 30" using the MONROE system.



Iluv2lrn 1 / -  
Nov 12, 2012   #1
Hello! I'm an untraditional student, and I've been out of school for years.
I've never written a persuasive speech, so I would appreciate any help I can get with it.
Unfortunately, I still have no clue about my attention getter. I really would appreciate any help I can get. Thanks!

Topic: Proposition 30
General Purpose: To Persuade
Specific Purpose: By the end of this speech the audience will agree that California's schools districts need more funding and in order to achieve this we need to vote "yes" for Proposition 30.

Thesis: Because students and teachers across school districts in California are facing educational issues commonly attributed to overcrowded classrooms, and teachers' layoffs due to budget cuts. Consequently, I believe that voters in the state of California should vote for Proposition 30 on the state ballot, so that state and districts can build more schools to lessen the crowding and hire more teachers to fill the schools.

I. Introduction
A) Attention Getter:
B) Relate Topic: Many of you taxpayers know someone who has or is attending our public schools.
C) Being a parent of two school-aged children and a taxpayer, I have a keen interest of what is wrong with my children's schools, and how my tax dollars are being distributed around my district.

D) Today, I will first show you the problems regarding overcrowded classrooms and the negative impact of budget cuts on our teachers. I will then show you a solution to these problems. Finally, I will explain the benefits of the solution to our educational system. Because students and teachers across school districts in California are facing educational issues commonly attributed to overcrowded classrooms, and teachers' layoffs due to budget cuts. Consequently, I believe that voters in the state of California should vote for Proposition 30 on the state ballot, so that state and districts can build more schools to lessen the crowding and hire more teachers to fill the schools.

Transition Sentence: Let me begin by discussing the problem.
II. Body: Need
A) Overcrowded classrooms are a common problem in California's educational system, and it has simply been ignored. Many of you voters don't realize the underlying risks that come along with this issue.

1. With our class sizes on the rise students are experiencing problems with paying attention or receiving help from their instructor. Many of you are not aware of what our students are enduring within these packed classrooms.

2. According to the findings by a group of researchers from the University of California, Los Angeles, Institute for Democracy, Education, and Access (UCLA IDEA).California's schools enroll up to five times the number of students they were built to serve. In other words, schools that were built for 800 occupants are now housing 4,200 students. I don't need a calculator to see how that is a problem for our students.

3. Furthermore, if you're a student in a classroom of 40 plus, how can you concentrate with so much noise and distractions, let alone, any personal time with a teacher? According to the University of California, Los Angeles, Institute for Democracy, Education, and Access, Principal Craig Galloway commented, "I think it's very difficult for them to come and ask questions, come and ask for help when they know the teachers...just have so much to do." These findings show why are classrooms are overcrowded, and the extent of students problems within a classroom.

B) Just as students need more attention in a congested classroom, teachers also need to have the opportunity to teach our students. There's nothing more stressful to a teacher, apart from large classes, than the fear of being laid-off and lack of basic teaching tools.

1. In 2007 Legislative Analyst's Office (LAO) reported that the size of teachers workforce has decreased by about $32,000 teachers (11 percent). With that many instructors unemployed then who's educating our students?

And to add insult to injury, NBC's Miguel Almaguer reported that Governor Brown has asked state employees to work a four-day, 38-hour week as part of a massive spending cuts needed to help the state close an unexpected $15.7 billion budget deficit. For instance, my friend Geraldine, a school counselor for Garfield High School, described to me what one-day of her four-day work week consisted of answering phone calls at the front office, substituting for various teachers, which sadly left her with little time to counsel young troubled students who are sent to her due to unruly behavior in their overcrowded classrooms. Teachers and Counselors are the vital links to our students college success.

2. Apart from lay-offs and short workweeks, teachers lack essential educational materials and clean facilities. For instance, graphing paper, calculators, lab equipment, clean toilets. According the University of California, Los Angeles, Institute for Democracy, Education, and Access, Principal Craig Galloway a public school principal commented: "Science teachers can no longer purchase a class set of frogs for dissection. Now there is just one set "for the class [which] the teacher shows on a document camera, and so that's not really engaging learning." Schools should be inviting and pleasant to our eyes. Unfortunately, the report notes that many California schools have had to lay-off several of their custodial as a result, the remaining staff had not been able to keep up with trash disposal, and this has led to "an increase in rodents, roaches, and other living things." Our current students can't wait any longer we need to help them now.

Transition: Now that we know the problem, let's look at the solution.

III. Solution:

A. I propose that in our upcoming elections on November 6 you vote "yes" for Proposition 30 on the ballot. This action will help build new schools and hire more teachers.

B. The "Public Policy Institute of California" has outlined the benefits of voting for Proposition 30, and I would like to share that information with you.

C. According to Governor Brown, the official title to this new tax plan is "Tax To Benefit Public Schools, Social Services, Public Safety, And Road Maintenance." He is asking the wealthiest who earn more than $250,000 to pay more taxes in order to prevent deeper school cuts.

D. The tax revenues from Proposition 30, will go into a newly created state account called the Education Protection Account (EPA) which will help alleviate our current problems of classroom overcrowding and hiring more teachers.

I. The estimated $6 billion dollars in additional state revenues will build new schools and eliminate our current congested classrooms.
II. In today's society, an education helps you open many closed doors. By voting for Proposition 30 the new revenues will be building new schools, and students will be able to have more one-on-one with their instructors. The teacher will have more flexibility to instruct and help struggling students.

E. I know some of you in the audience might be thinking, "I don't want anyone telling me how to vote. It's bad enough the election coverage is mentally exhausting." You see, your vote is important for our current and future students.

Transition: This brings me to my last point. Let's visualize some of the benefits that our educational system will receive if we vote "yes" on Proposition 30.

III. Visualization:
A. New schools:
I. No more crowding.
II. More teachers in schools.
Conclusion:
I. In conclusion,
II. I have shared with you the problems that our students and teachers are currently experiencing, a solution to this problem, and the resulting benefits.

III. Now I am asking you the people who have any real choice in how their taxes should be utilized over this matter is you the voter.

IV. In order to accomplish this...

Eunhae126 3 / 16  
Nov 26, 2012   #2
As a debater, I would take on a persuasive speech in a more demanding tone. For your attention grabber, use a scenario of a specific student (can be made up of course) and then list your contentions in order, then due your explaining in depth on each. You have very good statistics, but they won't matter unless you show the affects they have. After every contention(or your case solution), you should state an opposition with a refutation to show that you have thoroughly thought about your topics.

Hope this helps


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