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Another school in Washington Personal Statement[transfer]



anella /  
Apr 22, 2009   #1
"It has been said that arguing against globalization is like arguing against the laws of gravity," notes Kofi Annan, a Ghanaian diplomat. This quote confirms how rooted globalization is in our society today. I did not understand the significance of globalization until I entered DePaul University. In high school, I was the managing and photo editor of my high school news paper, "Puma Press". After I graduated from high school, I was uncertain of the concentration within communication that was suitable for me. Journalism was something I enjoyed; however, I wanted to expand my current knowledge on the interaction within different culture. I spent part of my freshman year probing my ideal major, whether that was International Marketing or International Studies. However, last spring I was fortunate enough to sign up for a globalization course that would later pave my path in communication. It never occurred to me how globalized and interconnected the world has become. I had better understanding of the world; however, I wanted to start building off on my newfound knowledge. This quarter, I am taking Intercultural Communications. Through this course I gained intercultural competence and understanding of cultural barriers. My globalization course created a basis that would cradle my future courses in communication.

Currently, I am applying for the general admissions because there weren't any options for communication. However, since I am planning to double major, I am contemplating the other major that would work with my current major. I am seeking another major that would complement communications, my career goals, and personal experience. Communications has not only been part of my academic experience but personal as well. Throughout my childhood, I was traveling to and from Montenegro, attended sixth grade in Serbia, and adapted to the Slavic traditions. I experienced the cultural barriers and developed intercultural competence during my stay in Serbia. I was taught to abolish my American identity and adjust to the traditional concept of life. This experience allowed me to break out of my American customs and empathize with other cultures.

Post college, I am planning on working for a company or firm that primarily deals with businesses outside of the United States. I would also like to continue on to graduate school so that I will achieve proficiency in my field. Ideally, after graduate school, I would like to work alongside companies with training their employees on intercultural communication. In addition, I would also like to conduct research on intercultural or mass communication because communication is becoming more prevalent today. It is necessary to expand the current knowledge of other cultures outside of United States. It is essential to grasp the basic concept of intercultural communication before it is implemented. Through this research, I will be able to communicate with others on breaking the cultural barrier and embracing a culture other than one's own.

florazhou 5 / 24  
Apr 23, 2009   #2
Hi anella
well I think you have so many sentences start with" I ".I know this is a PS,but them make your essay not coherent very well.

And you need more specific example to show your unique aspect

Good luck
SairaTasartir 5 / 36  
Apr 23, 2009   #3
interaction within different culture.

...different cultures.

Newspaper is one word, and I think high-school should be hyphenated.

I am contemplating the other major that would work with my current major.

--I need to decide what other major would work with my current major.

Communications has not only been part of my academic experience but personal as well.

...but my personal experience as well.

Throughout my childhood, I was traveling to and from Montenegro, attended sixth grade in Serbia, and adapted to the Slavic traditions.

Throughout my childhood, as I traveled to and from Montenegro, I attended sixth grad in Serbia, adapting to their Slavic traditions.

I am planning on working for a company or firm

I plan on...

Ideally, after graduate school, I would like to work alongside companies with training their employees on intercultural communication.

Ideally, after graduate school, I would enjoy working with companies to train their employees in intercultural communication.

In addition, I would also like to conduct research on intercultural or mass communication because communication is becoming more prevalent today.

Because communication is becoming more prevalent today, I would also like to conduct research on intercultural or mass communication.

Other than that, I think someone else will have to assist you on essay structure. Good luck!
EF_Kevin 8 / 13052  
Apr 23, 2009   #4
Kofi Annan was the Secratary General of the UN, so don't just call him a diplomat. Maybe you should start by writing:

Former Secretary General of the United Nations Kofi Annan notes, "It has been said that arguing against globalization is like arguing against the laws of gravity...

And I think you should end your first paragraph here:
whether that was International Marketing or International Studies.
HoweverLast spring I was fortunate enough to sign up for a globalization course...

That will improve the structure...

:)


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