The Art Institute Essays..

I have starting writing this essay and could use a little help with it, I dont know if it sounds right? Im trying to get in it The Art Institute and need some help with this thank you

My career goals are to start a thriving business in photography and to receive the best education that I can. In the next three to four years I would like to be done with my bachelor's degree, so that I can be a freelancing, wedding, and portrait photographer. I want to own a studio and have a good team working with me. I would like to be earning a salary that I can live off and still have enough money for me and my son to have a good time. I want a career that will further my artistic abilities; while exploring my creative side in art, which I have never been able to do in any other filed. It is something that I have always had a passion for, and it brings joy in to other people's lives. In the end I think it will be one of the most fulfilling careers I have done in my life.

Can you look over this and tell me what you think? Thank you

Section removed, as I have already commented on it.

I am currently going to Red Rocks Community College for photography. I have a full photography studio at my house. I have been exploring all the possibilities in the field of photography and trying to achieve the best education. I have been going to other photograph studios to see their work to help me improve on my work. I also have been working on creating a strong and diverse portfolio. I have been shooting everything that I can so that I can acquire the training I need. Also I have been setting up goals for myself to stay on track to start my own business and doing the research to have a thriving business. I have a strong commitment to photography and I will do what it takes to achieve my bachelor's degree. I have been taking every opportunity that I can find to help me develop a solid career.

The Art Institute of Colorado will help me with my education by giving me the tools I need. The benefits of going to your school are I will gain the understanding to what I need to know about photography. Your school has more hands on teaching in the field that I am going in to. Achieving my bachelor's degree will give me the qualifications I need to run a high quality business. I think The Art Institute is going to offer me a distinguished education and help me achieve my career goals. It's a chance for me to show my creative side; while learning the skills I need to start my business. I think I will be able to gain the talent I need by attending you school. Overall I think The Art Institute will guide me in the right path to a very rewarding career; in something that I love to do.