Career path/ Freedom/ Flexibility; UPENN ; Engage academically

Any feedback would be greatly appreciated!!!!!! Thank you very much!

A Penn education provides a liberal arts and sciences foundation across multiple disciplines with a practical emphasis in one of four undergraduate schools: the College of Arts and Sciences, the School of Engineering and Applied Science, the School of Nursing, or the Wharton School.

Given the undergraduate school to which you are applying, please discuss how you will engage academically at Penn. (Please answer in 300 words or less.)

At the University of Pennsylvania, I am hoping to apply to the College of Arts and Sciences, however I am undecided in regards to my major. I hope that by going to Penn, I will finally determine which career path I would like to pursue. I believe that the College will help me find my true passion chiefly due to the sheer number of academic options it offers. With more than 50 majors and 2000 courses to choose from, I know I will find the ones that suit me best.

In addition to this, I would like to optimize the academic freedom that Penn offers. By getting to choose courses I am initially curious about, I will be able to determine where my academic interests lie. If I happen to dislike a particular field of study, Penn gives me the opportunity to search elsewhere and try again, which is especially important to undecided students like myself.

I also hope to take advantage of the flexibility Penn offers in regards to their education. Having the ability to pursue interdisciplinary studies in the different colleges at Penn will allow me to satisfy both my intellectual and personal thirst for knowledge. I will not have to focus solely on my major; I will get the opportunity to immerse myself in a variety of other subjects. Being able to perfect my French while simultaneously learning about the theory of economics is an experience found at few universities, and is not a chance I would pass up at Penn.

The distinctive tools that are offered at Penn will help me greatly in shifting from an undecided senior into a driven undergraduate with a strong set of goals and a rigorous curriculum. The vast amount of courses, flexibility and interdisciplinary options are all unique characteristics of this school and will be essential to my academic engagement at the University of Pennsylvania.

This is a decent essay, however many of the things you said can be found at just about any university as most university have a college of arts and sciences where you can study a wide variety of topics, so I'm not sure if you should focus so much on that as its actually pretty common.

Exactly. The grammar is fine and the essay, in its self, does its purpose. However, I would strongly recommend that you use some more specific details and personal reasons for wanting to attend Penn.

"In addition to this, I would like to optimize the academic freedom that Penn offers. By getting to choose courses I am initially curious about, I will be able to determine where my academic interests lie. If I happen to dislike a particular field of study, Penn gives me the opportunity to search elsewhere and try again, which is especially important to undecided students like myself."-----> I felt like this paragraph was vague. Give examples. Also get rid of "in addition to this". You don't want to sound like you are listing.

"I will get the opportunity to immerse myself in a variety of other subjects. Being able to perfect my French while simultaneously learning about the theory of economics is an experience found at few universities, and is not a chance I would pass up at Penn."-----> I understand you need to incorporate Penn into this sentence because you are talking about penn being part of the few universities, but you need to add it a different way. Maybe just remove few universities. Also remove "about" in front of "the theory..."

"The distinctive tools that are offered at Penn will help me greatly in shifting from an undecided senior into a driven undergraduate with a strong set of goals and a rigorous curriculum. The vast amount of courses, flexibility and interdisciplinary options are all unique characteristics of this school and will be essential to my academic engagement at the University of Pennsylvania." ---> Comma after "flexibility." The last sentence is just brushing over the whole short answer. Try to make the last sentence a bit more interesting than restating.

Overall its a decent essay. Try to spice up your vocabulary and maybe add more details. Maybe there's a specific club there or a research opportunity elaborate on that. I know this short answer is just hard to make fun and creative, I had the same problem. So the essay just passes as ok, nothing that can make or break your decision. Hope that helped

thank you so much, your comments were really really helpful! i appreciate you taking this much time so much!! :) happy new year!