Unanswered [1] | Urgent [0]
  

Home / Undergraduate   % width   Posts: 5


'I come from Kosova' - Stanford Supp - dear roomate



agronr 3 / 12  
Dec 25, 2011   #1
Virtually all of Stanford's undergraduates live on campus. Write a note to your future roommate that reveals something about you or that will help your roommate - and us - know you better.

Dear Roommate,
I am very happy to know that we will be sharing a room. I know that we will be sharing a lot of time together and I sincerely hope we become very close friends.

My name is Agron Rexhaj and I come from Kosova. I like to read and to analyze challenging problems, but I also love sports, especially soccer. I feel that soccer is a way for me to relieve my daily stress and have fun. I try to listen to different kinds of music, so you should not worry about that. I have a serious look most of the time but I assure you I am a very funny person. I love philosophy, history and math, but I also have a passion for science and technology and I try to keep in touch with the latest advancements in those fields. I am a lucid-dreaming-type-of-guy, and sometimes you might see me looking at something but thinking about something else, just like Isaac Newton, and I might need a falling apple to get me back on track. I know it will seem odd, but you'll get used to it! While studying, I like to place my books everywhere around me, but I am very organized and will do my best to keep the room tidy.

Although it's my first time sharing a room, I know we will understand each other and I promise you you'll feel as if you had known me for a hundred years!

Sincerely yours,
Agron

--------------------
Thanks a lot. Please criticize every aspect of it.

Noobzilla 3 / 22  
Dec 25, 2011   #2
HERE GOES NOTHING:

normally essays are more...er....Serious...begin the essay with something more catchy, even funny.
"I assure you I am a very funny person" i honestly laughed while reading this part, (don't mind), your essay is tooooo serious for my taste. And prove not show

the later bit is good.
again, like many essays I've read, your essay misses a YOU AS A PERSON. they know you like maths and what not, the committee wants to know how you are as a person.

oh, and if i were you, i would add some humour just to make it interesting

good luck
OP agronr 3 / 12  
Dec 25, 2011   #3
Well, a personality developed for 18 years cannot be described with 300 words. But thanks anyway.
deremifri 9 / 135  
Dec 25, 2011   #4
I somehow agree with noobzilla on the humor part.
You are writing to your roommate who is the same age (o.k. you are actually writing to 50 year old admission officers, but you have to pretend)

So, the perfect mix is the following:
On the surface you are trying to tell your roommate why you will be a good companion.
If you manage at the same time to convey that you will be a great college student, then it will be just great.
You could try something like this:
Although I look serious I am a very funny person (I will laught at all your jokes.)
Another thing is the line :
I try to keep in touch with the latest advancements in that field
This sounds a little bit to0, you know, formal and unoriginal.
And you could add a sentence on how you interact with other people generally.
But these are just some suggestions, generally a really descriptive and not too serious essay.
I especially liked the lucid dreaming passage.
OP agronr 3 / 12  
Dec 25, 2011   #5
Max, thank you very much. I will try and fix it the way you said. I just had some ggreat ideas about it. Thanks again.


Home / Undergraduate / 'I come from Kosova' - Stanford Supp - dear roomate
Do You Need
Academic Writing
or Editing Help?
Fill out one of these forms:

Graduate Writing / Editing:
GraduateWriter form ◳

Best Essay Service:
CustomPapers form ◳

Excellence in Editing:
Rose Editing ◳

AI-Paper Rewriting:
Robot Rewrite ◳

Academic AI Writer:
Custom AI Writer ◳