I have attached the first draft of the SOP that I have written. I think the SOP is too lengthy. How do i make it more effective? Tell me the what things I should exclude from my SOP. Since my native language is not english, pls tell me if there are any flaws in my SOP.
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Being an automobile enthusiast from childhood, I used to always wonder how cars were designed and created. My love of cars can only be compared to my interest in exploring how they could be built. When it was time to decide on my undergraduate course, I chose Mechanical Engineering because I knew it would provide me with a firm foundation in the basics of Engineering, while allowing me to maintain flexibility with my graduate studies. The coursework I have taken, as well as the experiences I have had throughout my undergraduate years have really inspired me to pursue further studies in Automobile Engineering.
I attribute much of my zeal for automobiles to my involvement with the Society of Automotive Engineers (SAE) during my formative undergraduate years. SAE organized a number of academic seminars, competitions and conferences during my undergraduate years of study and during that time, I was selected as co-speaker for a number of seminars covering topics such as brake-system design, manufacturing methods employed and basics of automotive to guide junior members in the club. This experience shaped my public speaking skills and helped me develop my ability to adapt to new situations. SAE also organizes BAJA, a national level inter-collegiate All-Terrain Vehicle (ATV)-building competition sponsored by automotive companies such as Mahindra & Mahindra and John Deere. BAJA is a competition where teams of undergraduate students are asked to design and build a single-seater off-road vehicle and then test the endurance of the vehicle through various performance metrics. I was a part of BAJA-2012 team. As a part of the brake sub-team, I was responsible for the designing and installation of the hydraulic brake system in our car. As the head of the manufacturing team, I was responsible for choosing the manufacturing method as well as assigning the material for the car components that we would design. This was an excellent opportunity to put to practical use our knowledge of manufacturing techniques, material selection and heat treatments that we had picked up in our "Manufacturing Processes" and "Metallurgy" classes. This competition was also instrumental in helping me understand the importance of planning and time management, and also helped me develop an eye for aesthetics. We did have setbacks such as failure of the upright due to faulty casting, but we kept calm under the pressure of the competition and used a result oriented approach to resolve the issue. The competition has made me more proficient at analyzing and solving engineering problems and also taught me how to work in a team. BAJA has been my favorite experience with SAEINDIA, and it is responsible for my passion towards the automotive sector.
I believe that Automotive Engineering would be a good pursuit for me because I like creating things rather than just learning theories . In my first year of college,I represented my institution in a regional inter-collegiate robotics competition, where we were given the task of designing and constructing two level-one wired robots. First one was a replica of an industrial crane capable of lifting 6 pounds and the second one was a manually operated off-road vehicle(small robotic car), which was able to conquer artificially created off-road track and carry a load of 10 pounds ,being almost equal to the car's own weight. My curiosity about robots and participation in these events encouraged me to take Industrial Robotics as an elective subject. In this course I studied the working and logic behind industrial robots, including robotic arm which is extensively used in automobile industry. Most of the work needed in car building like painting, welding, assembly is automated and hence I feel that basic knowledge of robotics is absolutely essential.
Along with my studies and various activities in my third year, I got an opportunity to do an internship at Esmech, located in Thane that specializes in Cold Rolling Mills. As an intern, I was working on a project named "Study and analysis of single stage scissor lift mechanism" which dealt with designing of single stage scissor mechanism used to lift heavy loads. I calculated optimal cross-section of the link and optimal position of actuator hinge point on the link. This helped the company to have the scissor link work under the required lower pressure actuator. This helped me in learning to implement ideas from designing and gave me a good work experience. In addition to this, in my final year, I undertook a project of Rashtriya Chemicals and Fertilizers (RCF Ltd.) giving me an opportunity to work at the company's Steam generation plant. I was assigned the task of assessing the performance of the company's boilers and to recommend innovative ideas to improve their efficiency and reliability. I recommended the company to use mechanical seal in the feed pump instead of gland packing, which would help it in reducing it's maintenance as well as the losses. My recommendation was appreciated by the Company. This experience made me more mature both as an engineer and a person and gave me good work exposure in the Industry.
In addition to exploring different applications of engineering, I also expanded my horizons and interests through various extracurricular activities. Among other things I have formed a club of riding enthusiasts called "Tarmac Scorchers" to enhance our understanding of performance and functioning of different vehicles. We organise road trips using different types of vehicles in different terrains to evaluate their performance.
To conclude, my interest lies very much so within the realm of Automobile Engineering. I believe a masters degree in Automobile Engineering would allow me the opportunity to enter the industry of vehicle design. I think that working in the automotive industry would be a good use of my engineering skills in positively impacting society. My passion towards automobile, my experience in BAJA, as well as my academic performance in related core subjects like Internal Combustion Engines make me believe that I would be a strong candidate for this program. Also, I am very interested in vehicle prototype program(Deep orange) by Clemson university. This is something I would love to work on during my graduation and hence I am applying for Master's in Automotive Engineering at your University. I request to consider my application favourably
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Being an automobile enthusiast from childhood, I used to always wonder how cars were designed and created. My love of cars can only be compared to my interest in exploring how they could be built. When it was time to decide on my undergraduate course, I chose Mechanical Engineering because I knew it would provide me with a firm foundation in the basics of Engineering, while allowing me to maintain flexibility with my graduate studies. The coursework I have taken, as well as the experiences I have had throughout my undergraduate years have really inspired me to pursue further studies in Automobile Engineering.
I attribute much of my zeal for automobiles to my involvement with the Society of Automotive Engineers (SAE) during my formative undergraduate years. SAE organized a number of academic seminars, competitions and conferences during my undergraduate years of study and during that time, I was selected as co-speaker for a number of seminars covering topics such as brake-system design, manufacturing methods employed and basics of automotive to guide junior members in the club. This experience shaped my public speaking skills and helped me develop my ability to adapt to new situations. SAE also organizes BAJA, a national level inter-collegiate All-Terrain Vehicle (ATV)-building competition sponsored by automotive companies such as Mahindra & Mahindra and John Deere. BAJA is a competition where teams of undergraduate students are asked to design and build a single-seater off-road vehicle and then test the endurance of the vehicle through various performance metrics. I was a part of BAJA-2012 team. As a part of the brake sub-team, I was responsible for the designing and installation of the hydraulic brake system in our car. As the head of the manufacturing team, I was responsible for choosing the manufacturing method as well as assigning the material for the car components that we would design. This was an excellent opportunity to put to practical use our knowledge of manufacturing techniques, material selection and heat treatments that we had picked up in our "Manufacturing Processes" and "Metallurgy" classes. This competition was also instrumental in helping me understand the importance of planning and time management, and also helped me develop an eye for aesthetics. We did have setbacks such as failure of the upright due to faulty casting, but we kept calm under the pressure of the competition and used a result oriented approach to resolve the issue. The competition has made me more proficient at analyzing and solving engineering problems and also taught me how to work in a team. BAJA has been my favorite experience with SAEINDIA, and it is responsible for my passion towards the automotive sector.
I believe that Automotive Engineering would be a good pursuit for me because I like creating things rather than just learning theories . In my first year of college,I represented my institution in a regional inter-collegiate robotics competition, where we were given the task of designing and constructing two level-one wired robots. First one was a replica of an industrial crane capable of lifting 6 pounds and the second one was a manually operated off-road vehicle(small robotic car), which was able to conquer artificially created off-road track and carry a load of 10 pounds ,being almost equal to the car's own weight. My curiosity about robots and participation in these events encouraged me to take Industrial Robotics as an elective subject. In this course I studied the working and logic behind industrial robots, including robotic arm which is extensively used in automobile industry. Most of the work needed in car building like painting, welding, assembly is automated and hence I feel that basic knowledge of robotics is absolutely essential.
Along with my studies and various activities in my third year, I got an opportunity to do an internship at Esmech, located in Thane that specializes in Cold Rolling Mills. As an intern, I was working on a project named "Study and analysis of single stage scissor lift mechanism" which dealt with designing of single stage scissor mechanism used to lift heavy loads. I calculated optimal cross-section of the link and optimal position of actuator hinge point on the link. This helped the company to have the scissor link work under the required lower pressure actuator. This helped me in learning to implement ideas from designing and gave me a good work experience. In addition to this, in my final year, I undertook a project of Rashtriya Chemicals and Fertilizers (RCF Ltd.) giving me an opportunity to work at the company's Steam generation plant. I was assigned the task of assessing the performance of the company's boilers and to recommend innovative ideas to improve their efficiency and reliability. I recommended the company to use mechanical seal in the feed pump instead of gland packing, which would help it in reducing it's maintenance as well as the losses. My recommendation was appreciated by the Company. This experience made me more mature both as an engineer and a person and gave me good work exposure in the Industry.
In addition to exploring different applications of engineering, I also expanded my horizons and interests through various extracurricular activities. Among other things I have formed a club of riding enthusiasts called "Tarmac Scorchers" to enhance our understanding of performance and functioning of different vehicles. We organise road trips using different types of vehicles in different terrains to evaluate their performance.
To conclude, my interest lies very much so within the realm of Automobile Engineering. I believe a masters degree in Automobile Engineering would allow me the opportunity to enter the industry of vehicle design. I think that working in the automotive industry would be a good use of my engineering skills in positively impacting society. My passion towards automobile, my experience in BAJA, as well as my academic performance in related core subjects like Internal Combustion Engines make me believe that I would be a strong candidate for this program. Also, I am very interested in vehicle prototype program(Deep orange) by Clemson university. This is something I would love to work on during my graduation and hence I am applying for Master's in Automotive Engineering at your University. I request to consider my application favourably