Ok here's my essay, hopefully it meshes with the prompt.
One problem is its about 380 words and needs to be ~250! Tips on skimming it + general feedback = super appreciated!
"We know that diversity makes us a better university -- better for learning, for teaching, and for conducting research." (U-M President Mary Sue Coleman)
Share an experience through which you have gained respect for intellectual, social, or cultural differences. Comment on how your personal experiences and achievements would contribute to the diversity of the University of Michigan.
Diversity is not always about race, gender, or ethnicity. I realized this in my sophomore year summer when I attended the National Youth Forum on medicine at the University of California Los Angeles. At this two week conference, I was completely immersed into the field of medicine learning from trained professionals, instructors, and fellow peers.
The forum encouraged leadership in the field of medicine and prompted students to take every leadership opportunity that became available to them. When my team was set to receive a guest speaker, a volunteer greeter was needed. Jumping on the leadership boat, I volunteered to personally receive the speaker and introduce him to my eager colleagues. The day of the lecture I greeted the speaker, Mr. Hisham, in the speaker auditorium with a good, strong handshake. He immediately charmed me with his jubilant personality and quick smile. He told me he came to speak to us about his experience as a patient in the health care system. As Mr. Hisham began his narrative to our group, he revealed to us that he currently suffers from AIDS. At that revelation I immediately cringed, contracting my hand in fright. I had never before met an AIDS patient and certainly never touched one before. Rationally, I comprehended how AIDS can be transferred and an analysis of our interaction should have eased my worry, but the stigma of the disease kept me irrationally frozen in a panic. Slowly I reevaluated my thought. I realized that if people were as irrationally afraid of AIDS patients as I was in that moment, people like Mr. Hisham would never receive a handshake, a kiss on a cheek, or a hug. It's as Mother Teresa once said, "If you judge people, you have no time to love them." Before I could judge him, I liked Mr. Hisham. When I judged him, I feared him. As I released my prejudice, I appreciated him. As I bade Mr. Hisham farewell, I gave his hand a good, strong handshake.
The University of Michigan welcomes and embraces diversity. Especially with the inception of the Diversity Blueprints Task Force, I know the University of Michigan will embody my center for the pursuit of higher learning in an environment that celebrates educational, cultural, and personal diversity.
One problem is its about 380 words and needs to be ~250! Tips on skimming it + general feedback = super appreciated!
"We know that diversity makes us a better university -- better for learning, for teaching, and for conducting research." (U-M President Mary Sue Coleman)
Share an experience through which you have gained respect for intellectual, social, or cultural differences. Comment on how your personal experiences and achievements would contribute to the diversity of the University of Michigan.
Diversity is not always about race, gender, or ethnicity. I realized this in my sophomore year summer when I attended the National Youth Forum on medicine at the University of California Los Angeles. At this two week conference, I was completely immersed into the field of medicine learning from trained professionals, instructors, and fellow peers.
The forum encouraged leadership in the field of medicine and prompted students to take every leadership opportunity that became available to them. When my team was set to receive a guest speaker, a volunteer greeter was needed. Jumping on the leadership boat, I volunteered to personally receive the speaker and introduce him to my eager colleagues. The day of the lecture I greeted the speaker, Mr. Hisham, in the speaker auditorium with a good, strong handshake. He immediately charmed me with his jubilant personality and quick smile. He told me he came to speak to us about his experience as a patient in the health care system. As Mr. Hisham began his narrative to our group, he revealed to us that he currently suffers from AIDS. At that revelation I immediately cringed, contracting my hand in fright. I had never before met an AIDS patient and certainly never touched one before. Rationally, I comprehended how AIDS can be transferred and an analysis of our interaction should have eased my worry, but the stigma of the disease kept me irrationally frozen in a panic. Slowly I reevaluated my thought. I realized that if people were as irrationally afraid of AIDS patients as I was in that moment, people like Mr. Hisham would never receive a handshake, a kiss on a cheek, or a hug. It's as Mother Teresa once said, "If you judge people, you have no time to love them." Before I could judge him, I liked Mr. Hisham. When I judged him, I feared him. As I released my prejudice, I appreciated him. As I bade Mr. Hisham farewell, I gave his hand a good, strong handshake.
The University of Michigan welcomes and embraces diversity. Especially with the inception of the Diversity Blueprints Task Force, I know the University of Michigan will embody my center for the pursuit of higher learning in an environment that celebrates educational, cultural, and personal diversity.
