Ethics and Integrity - when it affects your family

Members of the Caltech community live, learn, and work within an Honor System with one simple guideline; 'No member shall take unfair advantage of any other member of the Caltech community.' While seemingly simple, questions of ethics, honesty and integrity are sometimes puzzling. Share a difficult situation that has challenged you. What was your response, and how did you arrive at a solution? (200 word max)

words can hurt

When should we tell the truth? Is it okay to tell a family that their daughter has no chances of surviving her cancer's treatment?

My 81-year-old grandmother calls me. I know exactly what she will say: another "adventure" of my father, another lie she found out, another help her "perfect son" denied. At the end, she will cry and beg me to ask dad to talk to her,to visit her.

Alright, I call him. He soon realizes her appeal and gets even angrier, because "I have nothing to do with it". He actually means that I shouldn't be aware of his "enterprises". What should I do? Keep quiet? Give some relief to grandma and say that her impetuous son is coming, he is just busy? Tell my father he is wrong and face his truculent look for weeks?

I take into account Job 15:3: "Should he argue with useless talk, Or with words which are not profitable?". I choose my words and talk to my father. I know what he will say and I face it. If he doesn't change, I will persist until he realizes that I can't agree with his behavior. What he does is not what he taught me.

Hi Isabella, for this essay, I feel as though you have a huge resentment towards your dad and most of your sentences are questions which takes a lot of your word count? If I were you, I would use this to describe how this situation has shaped me. How did this situation between your grandma and your dad shape you? Because of this situation, why don't you want to be your dad? Do you want to help him change? If so, how? It's these little things colleges look for.

Your thought process is evident in your question statements which is good, but I want to read more about you if I was an AO.

Isabella, you have not resolved this issue with your father. Therefore, this is a non-response to the essay prompt. Quoting the bible is not going to change the fact that you wrote a highly creative, but seriously flawed presentation. For starters, you said something about a family and a daughter with cancer then it disappeared in reference to the story you told. If it is not related and you were just using it as a hook, you failed to catch the reviewers attention because you just left him confused by your reference. The story that you chose to tell has deep seated issues that cannot be presented and resolved within the prompt word requirement. In fact, you have not resolved the issue so it does not apply to the prompt. The prompt specifically requires you to state an incident that questioned your ethics, honesty, and integrity in a manner that found a solution in the end. Therefore, the ending to your response is incorrect. It would be best if you think of another topic to write about that does not involve such a personal matter that has yet to be concluded. Go for either an integrity, honest, or ethics story. Pick one. Do not try to use all 3, you don't have to. The prompt doesn't require it. One will be more than sufficient or this tale.

Thank you @Holt and @rowliejohnflores for your feedback!