This is my first draft of my essay for this prompt. please, tear this up and have no mercy whatsoever! i need lots of help.
Prompt #1 (freshman applicants)
Describe the world you come from - for example, your family, community or school - and tell us how your world has shaped your dreams and aspirations.
Every time I cross the border into Mexico, I get a glimpse of a poor, homeless woman with a child on her back on the busy streets of Tijuana trying to sell candy to support her family. As she unsuccessfully attempts to try to make a miniscule fortune by going car to car, I get a good picture of her face conveying nothing more than sadness and disparity. I have the urge to roll down my window and give her the spare change that I have, but the light turns green and I move on; the woman's face becomes nothing more than a mere memory. It is moments like these that I come to realize the many things that my parents have undergone when they used to live in Mexico. My family, especially my parents, has always been the center of my world. Their support derives from the cruel, limited opportunities they faced in Mexico and fuels the potential in me to exceed in the things I do.
Each new sunrise brings a constant reminder of how fortunate I am to be able to live the life I have and to grow up in an ideal environment. My parents, who came to the United States from Mexico in search of the "American Dream," constantly remind me to value education and to believe in the promises it holds for me in the future. They tell me stories about the hardships they faced and the limited opportunities that were available to them when they used to live in Mexico. Through their experiences, my parents were trying to remind me that I shouldn't waste the resources that I fortunately have and use them to my advantage.
Despite the hardships my parents faced, they were still able to support me in the things that I do everyday. Just like they had to make sacrifices to obtain a better life in the United States, they made sacrifices for me to obtain the best education and a better life. They would help me with my schoolwork or take me to my sporting events despite the idea that they had a rough day. I'm always reminded by my parents to never stop dreaming about the goals that I want to accomplish. With the support that they've been offering, I was able to succeed in becoming an excellent student and one of the strongest, diverse tri-athletes in my county. Through my parent's values and support, I was able to grow as an individual and use those attributes on the things I do on my own.
Through their support and the sacrifices that they have done for me, my family has shaped my dreams and aspirations to become a successful person. They taught me the importance of believing in myself and to use the resources that I have to my advantage. I've have always considered the challenge of trying to become part of the world of medicine and the opportunities it has for me to make a difference. The sacrifices of my parents have taught me that if I want to become part of the world of medicine, I too need to make sacrifices to achieve my goals. By becoming part of the world of medicine, I want to make a difference in the world by helping those who are less fortunate, such as the woman on the street.
Prompt #1 (freshman applicants)
Describe the world you come from - for example, your family, community or school - and tell us how your world has shaped your dreams and aspirations.
Every time I cross the border into Mexico, I get a glimpse of a poor, homeless woman with a child on her back on the busy streets of Tijuana trying to sell candy to support her family. As she unsuccessfully attempts to try to make a miniscule fortune by going car to car, I get a good picture of her face conveying nothing more than sadness and disparity. I have the urge to roll down my window and give her the spare change that I have, but the light turns green and I move on; the woman's face becomes nothing more than a mere memory. It is moments like these that I come to realize the many things that my parents have undergone when they used to live in Mexico. My family, especially my parents, has always been the center of my world. Their support derives from the cruel, limited opportunities they faced in Mexico and fuels the potential in me to exceed in the things I do.
Each new sunrise brings a constant reminder of how fortunate I am to be able to live the life I have and to grow up in an ideal environment. My parents, who came to the United States from Mexico in search of the "American Dream," constantly remind me to value education and to believe in the promises it holds for me in the future. They tell me stories about the hardships they faced and the limited opportunities that were available to them when they used to live in Mexico. Through their experiences, my parents were trying to remind me that I shouldn't waste the resources that I fortunately have and use them to my advantage.
Despite the hardships my parents faced, they were still able to support me in the things that I do everyday. Just like they had to make sacrifices to obtain a better life in the United States, they made sacrifices for me to obtain the best education and a better life. They would help me with my schoolwork or take me to my sporting events despite the idea that they had a rough day. I'm always reminded by my parents to never stop dreaming about the goals that I want to accomplish. With the support that they've been offering, I was able to succeed in becoming an excellent student and one of the strongest, diverse tri-athletes in my county. Through my parent's values and support, I was able to grow as an individual and use those attributes on the things I do on my own.
Through their support and the sacrifices that they have done for me, my family has shaped my dreams and aspirations to become a successful person. They taught me the importance of believing in myself and to use the resources that I have to my advantage. I've have always considered the challenge of trying to become part of the world of medicine and the opportunities it has for me to make a difference. The sacrifices of my parents have taught me that if I want to become part of the world of medicine, I too need to make sacrifices to achieve my goals. By becoming part of the world of medicine, I want to make a difference in the world by helping those who are less fortunate, such as the woman on the street.
