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The final race of an athlete - UBC Personal Profile



itsmedavis 1 / -  
Aug 6, 2024   #1
Tell us about who you are. How would your family, friends, and/or members of your community describe you? If possible, please include something about yourself that you are most proud of and why. (250 words)

I am ___________, a 17-year-old, grade 12 student at Lillian Osborne High School in Edmonton, Alberta. My family immigrated to Canada from Romania, and I am the first generation born in Canada. How do my family, friends, and members of my community describe me? Depends on who you ask. My family would say that I am a smart and caring individual who is very focus-driven. My friends would say that I am funny and that they enjoy spending time with me. They would also say that when things go wrong I am the one to call as they have always seen me take the initiative. My sweet old neighbour Mary-Lee would say that I am a charming and helpful boy who is responsible. One of my greatest accomplishments was getting second place at the biggest ski race in my area. I've been ski racing since I was three and for many years I would stand aside in the crowd as the other kids would be called up on the podium. Two years ago I told myself that I would no longer be simply adequate and I decided to start taking my sport seriously. I constantly went to my coaches for feedback and I showed up early to every single practice. All of my hard work over the season culminated in the final race of the season where I managed to get second place against provincial athletes.

Holt  Educational Consultant - / 15385  
Aug 7, 2024   #2
You do not have to introduce yourself and the origins of your family in Canada. That is not required information for this statement and the reviewer will not appreciate the deviation. However, if you can connect your heritage in that manner that relates to how your friends, community, and family view you, then you can revise the content to explain the roots of your family as it fits with the description of your personality or how people view you.

Start a 2nd paragraph for the achievement you are most proud of. That is a separate topic from the character description. Make sure that your discussion in this section somehow reflects the point of view of at least one sector in the previous paragraph to help show a different way in which you embody a particular point of view or, reiterate the point of view by referring to your achievement.


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