Common App essay--the topic is "Discuss some issue of personal, local, national, or international concern and its importance to you. " Please don't be afraid to be harsh! I can take it!
Two years before I was born, when my eldest sibling was only eleven years old, my parents decided that my family had to leave El Salvador to escape the civil war that constantly threatened their lives. My siblings were in high school while I was still in my first years of grade school. In truth, all three of my siblings were sub-par, albeit good-hearted students. Because my sister became pregnant and my eldest brother was unable to keep up with his schoolwork, they both dropped out of high school.
High school is a tough time for everyone, no matter your intellectual abilities or parental status. However, having no conceivable way to afford college, my brother and sister lost hope in their futures, or rather, never really had any. Even if my brother and sister somehow managed to find a way to finance getting through college, they still would have had to worry about possibly being deported while in school because they were illegal immigrants at the time.
The DREAM Act is a legislative proposal that, if passed, would allow qualifying illegal immigrants to apply for student loans and work studies to attend college. If the DREAM Act were around when my brother and sister were in high school, perhaps they would have had something to look forward to, instead of giving up and dropping out at the first sign of trouble.
I am aware of the fact that I am a talented student. I am fortunate because I am a natural-born citizen of this country and therefore have options to afford a college education, but what if I was in my siblings' shoes and was an illegal alien in high school? If I went through high school as an illegal alien like my brother and sister did, would I be as motivated to do as well in school as I am doing now, knowing that I had no chance of furthering my education? The passage of the DREAM Act would affect millions of young people. We should not limit the opportunities of immigrant students because of the decisions of their parents.
The major controversy surrounding the DREAM Act is that people believe that the government is supporting illegal immigration. A major point that these people are overlooking is that the DREAM Act would not apply to any future aliens. There is also no evidence that the United States government will ever propose, let alone pass, anything like this act ever again so they need not worry.
The DREAM Act has the ability to benefit not only the illegal immigrant students who would be given a chance to receive a truly equal education, but also the nation. The millions of permanent residents with a college education could certainly be the key to solving numerous issues, such as the current financial crisis. If the DREAM Act were signed into law, it would give hope to millions of young and yearning minds, even if it is too late to save those like my brother and sister.
Hello,
You essay is very controversial, but well written. The only thing that I would change(remove) is your usage of the word "alien". "Undocumented resident" is much more appropriate for a college application essay. Also, when you write an essay such as this one, you need to be careful that you state what is your opinion and what is fact. Facts need to be backed up by references. You make two general assumptions that come off as facts, which they are not..."There is also no evidence that the United States government will ever propose, let alone pass, anything like this act ever again so they need not worry." and "The millions of permanent residents with a college education could certainly be the key to solving numerous issues, such as the current financial crisis." Unless you have facts to back these statements up, you have to make sure your phrase them so that the reader knows that you are merely stating your opinion. -essay polisher
