I feel like my essay is too generic, and doesn't really say enough about me. I would love some feedback! Thanks :)
Prompt: Describe the world you come from - for example, your family, community or school - and tell us how your world has shaped your dreams and aspirations.
My life, for as long as I can remember, has been rather good; my family is relatively well-off, I go to a good school, I have lots of friends, and I've never really faced large hardships. I am a product of 2 people who came from India with little to their name, and through hard work, managed to make a good life for their children. Due to this, I've had access to advantages I'm sure many people don't receive. I was able to go to Kumon, so that I could get ahead in my studies at a young age. I was able to take music lessons, play tennis and badminton, and even I grew up a very nice neighborhood, went to great schools, and made lots of friends.
I distinctly realize remembering how privileged I was when i went to India at around the age of 10. I had been there before, but I wasn't really old enough to fully comprehend everything I saw there. This time however, as I walked around the busy city of Bangalore, I began to realize just how lucky I was to have everything I did. My first encounter with reality came with a beggar, an old lady carrying her grandchild with her, asking me for food. Now, as a 10 year old, this was more scary than it was sad or eye-opening for me, but nonetheless, it was an event that stuck in my head for years. Thus, as I thought about it when I was older and more mature, I realized how deplorable this was. Sadder still is that there are millions of people out there, not just in India, but all around the world who face conditions like these.
I further realized just how advantaged I was was when I volunteered at Sacred Heart, a place that helps the poor and homeless, in junior year. I used to go there with my mom to donate our old clothes, but I had never been inside, so it was a pretty new experience for me. Coming from a home where I've always had whatever I needed, seeing people who were ecstatic just getting 5 articles of clothing and some canned food, really struck me. Here I was complaining about how my dinner tasted last night, and yet there were people out there who didn't even have a dinner to complain about. And I realize things like this must seem obvious, and I knew that there were people in these kinds of situations, but seeing with your own eyes rather than just hearing about it is far more powerful.
In the end, since I come from a background which provided me with many blessings that helped me achieve all I have, I want to be able to solve problems that will help others receive the same things I did.
Prompt: Describe the world you come from - for example, your family, community or school - and tell us how your world has shaped your dreams and aspirations.
My life, for as long as I can remember, has been rather good; my family is relatively well-off, I go to a good school, I have lots of friends, and I've never really faced large hardships. I am a product of 2 people who came from India with little to their name, and through hard work, managed to make a good life for their children. Due to this, I've had access to advantages I'm sure many people don't receive. I was able to go to Kumon, so that I could get ahead in my studies at a young age. I was able to take music lessons, play tennis and badminton, and even I grew up a very nice neighborhood, went to great schools, and made lots of friends.
I distinctly realize remembering how privileged I was when i went to India at around the age of 10. I had been there before, but I wasn't really old enough to fully comprehend everything I saw there. This time however, as I walked around the busy city of Bangalore, I began to realize just how lucky I was to have everything I did. My first encounter with reality came with a beggar, an old lady carrying her grandchild with her, asking me for food. Now, as a 10 year old, this was more scary than it was sad or eye-opening for me, but nonetheless, it was an event that stuck in my head for years. Thus, as I thought about it when I was older and more mature, I realized how deplorable this was. Sadder still is that there are millions of people out there, not just in India, but all around the world who face conditions like these.
I further realized just how advantaged I was was when I volunteered at Sacred Heart, a place that helps the poor and homeless, in junior year. I used to go there with my mom to donate our old clothes, but I had never been inside, so it was a pretty new experience for me. Coming from a home where I've always had whatever I needed, seeing people who were ecstatic just getting 5 articles of clothing and some canned food, really struck me. Here I was complaining about how my dinner tasted last night, and yet there were people out there who didn't even have a dinner to complain about. And I realize things like this must seem obvious, and I knew that there were people in these kinds of situations, but seeing with your own eyes rather than just hearing about it is far more powerful.
In the end, since I come from a background which provided me with many blessings that helped me achieve all I have, I want to be able to solve problems that will help others receive the same things I did.
