Unanswered [3] | Urgent [0]
  

Home / Undergraduate   % width Posts: 5

"I lived in Puerto Rico" - University of Muchigan - My experience of diversity


jjinko 4 / 11  
Jan 30, 2010   #1
SHORT ANSWER QUESTION (APPROXIMATELY 250 WORDS)
"We know that diversity makes us a better university - better for learning, for teaching, and for conducting research."
Share an experience through which you have gained respect for intellectual, social, or cultural differences. Comment on how your personal experiences and achievements would contribute to the diversity of the University of Michigan.

I lived in Puerto Rico since I was five years old. When I first came here I didn't think it was bad until I went to a public school in Eleanor Roosevelt in Hato Rey. Everyone who saw me assumed I was Chinese and harassed me. I was a quiet girl that didn't want to be involved in troubles; so children, even adults, took advantage of my cowardliness and ridiculously emulated Chinese people: bowing to me with hands together and speaking gibberish. It always got on my nerves, but, painfully, I let it go. I knew I could do nothing; it was me against everyone. I thank God very much because later, someone became my friend and she did so much just by staying by my side. Thanks to her, gradually, my classmates and I began to get along.

I am from South Korea and I'm proud of it. Be it not for that girl, I would've closed my heart to these people and myself. My parents were very upset when they realized what I went through, but I thanked them for bringing me here. Although my time in this school was painful, it was also fun and I learned valuable lessons that shaped me to the person I am today. My three years in that school taught me to be wise, patient, brave, a good friend, a person of endurance, and most importantly, it taught me to respect people's differences. Truly, I am grateful to God for giving me the privilege of experiencing all this while I was still young. Nowadays, I am considered to be one of the most intellectual student at the school, my culture is respected and admired by many, and last but not least, I am loved and appreciated.

I believe my experiences and achievements will enable me to bring success to the field that makes the University of Michigan a better university. Diversity, to me, means people's uniqueness. I believe as we grow unique, we learn to respect the uniqueness of others. I look forward to meeting different people, learn from them and display my own differences, with hoping that I can be the light that others can come to with their ideas, visions and dreams, never doubting that blending my talents with those of others can change the world.
salbazili 4 / 14  
Jan 31, 2010   #2
Hello Yea,
These are some of my suggestions. I hope you find them somehow helpful, and if you think they are not what you hoped for, you can simply ignore them; everyone writes differently.

I have been living in Puerto Rico since I was five years old. When I first came here I didn't think (it? What was bad? Life in Puerto Rico? Or Puerto Rico itself?) was badunpleasant(or something similar) until I went to a public school in Eleanor Roosevelt in Hato Rey. Everyone who saw me assumed I was Chinese and harassed me. I was a quiet girl who didn't want to be involved in troubles; so other kids, along with adults, took advantage of my cowardliness and ridiculously emulated Chinese people: bowing to me with hands together and speaking gibberish. That really bothered me, yet, painfully, I let it go. I knew I could not prevent it alone ; it was me against everyone else . I thank God very much because later, someone became my friend and she did so much just by staying by my side. Thanks to her , gradually, my classmates and I began to get along.(rewrite this differently, and develop your story to show how your being different, among your peers, was a diversity experience)

I am from South Korea and I'm proud of it. Be it not for that girl, I would've closed my heart to these people and myself. My parents were very upset when they realized what I went through, but I thanked them for bringing me here. Although my time in this school was painful, it was also fun and I learned valuable lessons that shaped me to the person I am today. My three years in that school taught me to be wise, patient, brave, a good friend, a person of endurance, and most importantly, it taught me to respect people's differences. Truly, I am grateful to God for giving me the privilege of experiencing all this while I was still young. Nowadays, I am considered to be one of the most intellectual student at the school, my culture is respected and admired by many, and last but not least, I am loved and appreciated. I don't think you would need to mention this paragraph for that it adds nothing crucial to the essay; however, you still can add some of the information to the preceding paragraph. Also, this is going to help you meet the word limit.

I believe my experiences and achievements will enable, as they did in school?(State that here) me to bring success to the field that makes the University of Michigan a better university. Diversity, to me, means people's uniqueness. I believe that as we grow unique, we learn to respect the uniqueness of others. I look forward to meeting different people, learn from them and display("share" would be better) my own differences, with hoping that I can be a light that others can come to with their ideas, visions and dreams. Correspondingly, I don't doubt that blending my talents with those of others can change the world.

I hope that helps a little..

GoOd LuCk:-)
christiek 6 / 65  
Jan 31, 2010   #3
public school in Eleanor Roosevelt

--> Public school called Eleanor Roosevelt.

I was a quiet girl that didn't want to be involved in troubles;

--> one sentence.

My three years in that school taught me to be wise, patient, brave, a good friend, a person of endurance, and most importantly, it taught me to respect people's differences.

-> I know you only have 250 words but maybe you shouldn't just list all those characteristics. Some of them we can conclude from the essay itself but others you can show us how you are those things...

- I definitely think you answered the prompt : )

Good Luck!
OP jjinko 4 / 11  
Jan 31, 2010   #4
Thank you very much salbazili and christiek! ^^
This really helps me a lot.
God Bless!
hockey520 2 / 8  
Jan 31, 2010   #5
very well written. will post my advice/edits when i haev finished


Home / Undergraduate / "I lived in Puerto Rico" - University of Muchigan - My experience of diversity