Please tell us what attracts you specifically to the study of engineering:
"Doctor." It was a cliché response, but it was the one I would always give when asked the question "What do you want to be when you grow up?" I even knew what specific kind I wanted to be: pediatrician. This was until the day that my dad told me that my grandmother was slowly dying from a combination of diseases, primarily diabetes. After this information set in, I immediately asked, "But what about doctors? Why can't they help?" My dad simply answered, "It's genetic." I felt as if the floor had been pulled out from under me. I thought that doctors were the superheroes of society and could fix any problem, my main allure to the profession. If doctors couldn't help my grandmother, then who could? I began to research about diabetes and the different ways to control it. There were pills of course, but my grandmother had difficulty in swallowing them, so they were of little use. I then came across research that outlined the uses of engineering, specifically biomedical, to help ameliorate the pain. It was my dream come true. My passion of science and math combined with my love of helping others. As I did more and more research, I felt more and more at home with engineering. Engineers were the true superheroes: making machines that could save my grandmother, that could help society, that could do the impossible.
You have a good topic. But you may have exaggerated in some parts:
"but my grandmother had difficulty in swallowing them" I don't thats enough reason to dismiss pills. You can simply not talk about pills. you could say:There was the conventional medicine of course, but that just slowed the process down.
I hope it helped.
"Diabetics, Why Duke, Why Cornell- Biomedical Engineering"
If you are applying to the Pratt School of Engineering, please discuss why you want to study engineering and why you would like to study at Duke. (1-3 paragraphs)
"Doctor." That was the cliché response I would always give when asked the question
"What do you want to be when you grow up?"
I even knew my specialty: Pediatrics. This was until the day that my dad told me that my cousin, who I spend most of my time with when I visit India, was suffering from Type I diabetes. After this information set in, I immediately asked, "But what about doctors? Why can't they help?"
My dad simply answered, "There is no cure for diabetes."
I felt hopeless. I thought that doctors - the superheroes of society - could fix any problem. If doctors could not help my cousin, then who could? I reacted by turning to Google, I came across research that outlined the uses of engineering, specifically biomedical, to help ameliorate the pain. Researchers were attempting to create artificial intelligence (AI) that would analyze feedback about the levels of insulin and glucagon within the body. The AI would then, periodically, inform the patient about the best course of action to return blood glucose level to normal. In the future, I hope to be the scientist making ground breaking discoveries in the field of diabetic research. Biomedical engineering seemed to combine science, math, and my love of helping others. As I did more and more research, I felt more and more at home with engineering. Engineers are the true superheroes: making inventions that could save my cousin and help society; that could do the impossible.
Do the impossible: Duke engineering. The two couldn't be more synonymous. In order to accomplish the impossible I will have to conduct research and at Duke there is ample opportunity to do so. I plan to be part of the two-thirds of undergraduates who are conducting independent study research. At Duke University interdisciplinary research is not only allowed, but promoted. This quality is very important to me because my engineering dream includes creating an artificial pancreas that will help diabetics automatically control their blood glucose levels. In order to create this I will not only need to work in Biomedical Engineering, but also with other fields such as Chemical Engineering and DukeMed, one of the top hospital systems in the world. The promotion of global health through the Duke Global Health Institute makes Duke my top choice. All my uncles own their own clinics in India that were passed on to them from their fathers and even if I major in engineering, I know that I will incorporate medicine into my future. Through the Duke Global Health Institute I will receive first-hand experience on how to solve complex health problems while working with an interdisciplinary team. Duke is the only college that I know of that promotes an eight week civic project, DukeEngage. In high school, I always found community service to be an important part of my life, volunteering weekly at the local Hospice. I am excited to be able to continue volunteering at Duke, and to even raise the level from local to global. Whether it is through DukeEngage or the beautiful Durham setting, Duke appeals to me because it promotes accomplishing the impossible.
Is it ok that my essay is over 3 paragraphs? It is only because of the spacing of the dialogue. Thanks guys for any comments!
I think it is a great essay I am writing the sam essay myself =) I like the concept and it answers the question but I would suggest you make you conclusion a bit more powerful I guess. But overall I really like it.
Good Luck and HAPPY NEW YEAR!!=)
I reacted by turning to Google; I came across research that outlined the uses of engineering, specifically biomedical, to ameliorate the suffering
^That's all I really caught...
I think this essay is excelling actually. Very inspiring!
