Hey, can you please help check the grammar and add some comments of what you think of my essay.
Thanks in advance
Write an essay in which you tell us about someone who has made an impact on your life and explain how and why this person is important to you.
In the wall across from my bed is a map of the world. I wake up seeing it every morning and not think much of it. Looking at it any other day I see it as a piece of decoration in my room or as a homework aid for European history class. Coming from a tiresome day at school I come home and sit in front of it
Focusing my eyes on Thailand, the small country that holds so much history for my family and me, bits and pieces of time I shared with my grandmother came rushing back. Within each passing second I feel taken back to a moment with my grandmother where the images, smell and sound of her all combine to illustrate an exact moment I shared with her. I see my grandmother sitting at her desk meticulously reading the Chinese newspaper with her spectacles and large magnifying glass. I asked her how come she doesn't read the Thai newspaper like my mother, she simply reply's that she never learned. Then later I find out that my grandmother never went to school formally because over seventy years ago education was reserved for the children from wealthy families. However the persistence of my grandmother did not stop her, when the children of the house that my grandmother was a servant for had a tutor come over my grandmother would volunteer to fan the children so she would be able to learn discretely. My grandmother is the one person that I believe to have made an impact in my life because through her life events, her experiences taught me that it is important to triumph over adversity and set goals.
Redirecting my vision to look at the continent of Asia I start to think about the different influences that have been matriculated in into my family from China to Thailand and the United States. In the past my family did not have the luxury to be able to stay in a country and go to school, which explains my parent's lack of education. I reminisce back to a specific time when I was challenged by my parent's deficiency. During my first year of high school my father suffered a heart attack and was required to undergo open heart surgery. My motives toward school changed when I began to spend more time in the hospital than at home studying. With my parents lack of English skills I, for the first time, experienced adversity. It became my responsibility to translate what the doctor was saying, explaining the procedures the doctors plan to perform save my father's life. Remembering my grandmother's story of how she defied the odds, I began to see the calamity as challenge and a test of my abilities. I started refocusing my attention to balance out the time spent for school and at the hospital. In the end, during my father's rehabilitation I knew I became a stronger person, because I came to realize that there is no hardship I can not face.
Back to the reality of being the only presence in my room I start looking at the map as a whole. I remember now why I wanted this map so long ago. The map is a reminder of where I am and where I am going to go. Sometimes it is easy to digress and reminisce back to the past but it is important to stay focused and set goals for the future. Just as my grandmother did when setting her goal to read, like planting a seed she nurtures that seed by honing her skills any chance she gets and in the end she received her everlasting fruit of an education. My grandmother's experience inspires me greatly to set my goals and do anything I can to nurture my goal of becoming a surgeon, for that everlasting fruit of honor to save peoples lives will be worth achieving.
Thanks in advance
Write an essay in which you tell us about someone who has made an impact on your life and explain how and why this person is important to you.
In the wall across from my bed is a map of the world. I wake up seeing it every morning and not think much of it. Looking at it any other day I see it as a piece of decoration in my room or as a homework aid for European history class. Coming from a tiresome day at school I come home and sit in front of it
Focusing my eyes on Thailand, the small country that holds so much history for my family and me, bits and pieces of time I shared with my grandmother came rushing back. Within each passing second I feel taken back to a moment with my grandmother where the images, smell and sound of her all combine to illustrate an exact moment I shared with her. I see my grandmother sitting at her desk meticulously reading the Chinese newspaper with her spectacles and large magnifying glass. I asked her how come she doesn't read the Thai newspaper like my mother, she simply reply's that she never learned. Then later I find out that my grandmother never went to school formally because over seventy years ago education was reserved for the children from wealthy families. However the persistence of my grandmother did not stop her, when the children of the house that my grandmother was a servant for had a tutor come over my grandmother would volunteer to fan the children so she would be able to learn discretely. My grandmother is the one person that I believe to have made an impact in my life because through her life events, her experiences taught me that it is important to triumph over adversity and set goals.
Redirecting my vision to look at the continent of Asia I start to think about the different influences that have been matriculated in into my family from China to Thailand and the United States. In the past my family did not have the luxury to be able to stay in a country and go to school, which explains my parent's lack of education. I reminisce back to a specific time when I was challenged by my parent's deficiency. During my first year of high school my father suffered a heart attack and was required to undergo open heart surgery. My motives toward school changed when I began to spend more time in the hospital than at home studying. With my parents lack of English skills I, for the first time, experienced adversity. It became my responsibility to translate what the doctor was saying, explaining the procedures the doctors plan to perform save my father's life. Remembering my grandmother's story of how she defied the odds, I began to see the calamity as challenge and a test of my abilities. I started refocusing my attention to balance out the time spent for school and at the hospital. In the end, during my father's rehabilitation I knew I became a stronger person, because I came to realize that there is no hardship I can not face.
Back to the reality of being the only presence in my room I start looking at the map as a whole. I remember now why I wanted this map so long ago. The map is a reminder of where I am and where I am going to go. Sometimes it is easy to digress and reminisce back to the past but it is important to stay focused and set goals for the future. Just as my grandmother did when setting her goal to read, like planting a seed she nurtures that seed by honing her skills any chance she gets and in the end she received her everlasting fruit of an education. My grandmother's experience inspires me greatly to set my goals and do anything I can to nurture my goal of becoming a surgeon, for that everlasting fruit of honor to save peoples lives will be worth achieving.
