Unanswered [1] | Urgent [0]
  

Home / Undergraduate   % width   Posts: 5


'mom moved to the US from the Philippines' - Why NYU?



edwkoc 4 / 12  
Dec 30, 2011   #1
I'm ready to take on New York City in its entirely and I think the only way to really do that is to attend New York University because there are no boundaries between the two. My desire to go to NYU is a very personal one because my family background has given me the independence that it takes to survive in the Big Apple. My mom moved to the US from the Philippines six months after my birth and while I was raised into the American culture my mom had to learn everything, including the English language, all from scratch. My dad is also very different from the father's of my peers. Born in the 1930's he has yet to touch the keys of a computer or even own a cellphone. Therefore, its become my job to update him with the cyber information of the virtual world. I have amazing parents, but because of their backgrounds, I have also been responsible for some of the parenting that has only shaped me to be self-motivated and independent---qualities that will help me strive at NYU.

NYU is close to home, but can also seem very far away so its great to have a mix of both and a hop, skip, and a jump off "campus" are amazing internship opportunities that I would be able to take advantage of as a student. I plan to spend a lot of my time in college studying abroad and I am comforted by the fact that while I study in another country, I am still being taught by NYU professors and being enriched with the core NYU curriculum, but surrounded by the beauty and culture of another world.

"If you want it, it's out there." -something I've heard from many current NYU students. The diversity of NYU that reflects the diversity of the city itself attracts me because the student body and faculty seem to have an appreciation for all different types of ethnicities, religions, cultures, sexual orientations as well as appreciation for academic diversity. With all my work in the arts the last four years, although I don't plan to pursue a career in the arts, it would still be great to be around people who don't throw it off as just an extracurricular. The accepting atmosphere, cutting edge technology, and the fact that your experience is literally what you make of it are all qualities that shape a clear picture of the successful "me" at NYU.

need_advice 6 / 21  
Dec 30, 2011   #2
Great! The way you connected your background and your parents' background into why NYU fits you was well put together. I didn't notice any grammatical errors either.
andymarie 2 / 11  
Dec 30, 2011   #3
With all my work in the arts the last four years, although I don't plan to pursue a career in the arts, it would still be great to be around people who don't throw it off as just an extracurricular.<-- i don't get the idea of you putting this in.

The accepting atmosphere, cutting edge technology, and the fact that your experience is literally what you make of it are all qualities that draws a clear picture of the successful "me" at NYU.<-- have this a little more lucid.

I think you need to focus why you really want to go to NYU, you stated a couple or so...you should elaborate or strengthen your reasons a little bit more.

deadlines are near! good luck :)
4151yhh 3 / 9  
Dec 30, 2011   #4
With all my work in the arts the last four years, although I don't plan to pursue a career in the arts, it would still be great to be around people who don't throw it off as just an extracurricular.<-- i don't get the idea of you putting this in.

The overall answer is great and right on point. Same as Andrea that I'm not very sure why you putting the sentence above in this essay, I think it could be strike out in this essay since you have already make "why go to NYU" clear.

By the way, I was thinking about NYU too because of New York city but I changed my idea because there's no distinct campus~~

Good luck to your application!!!
carochoi 3 / 22  
Dec 30, 2011   #5
Great essay! It clearly shows your personal connection from your parents to NYU. One thing that might help your essay be more specific would be adding in several countries that you are interested in studying in. Just letting the university know that you want to study abroad might not cut it. Overall, good job.


Home / Undergraduate / 'mom moved to the US from the Philippines' - Why NYU?
Need Writing or Editing Help?
Fill out one of these forms:

Graduate Writing / Editing:
GraduateWriter form ◳

Best Essay Service:
CustomPapers form ◳

Excellence in Editing:
Rose Editing ◳

AI-Paper Rewriting:
Robot Rewrite ◳

Academic AI Writer:
Custom AI Writer ◳