Questbridge Essay/ Intellectual Vitality

Describe an experience that you have had or a concept you have learned about that intellectually excites you. When answering this question, you may want to consider some of the following questions: Why does this topic excite you? How does it impact the way you or others experience the world? What questions do you continue to ponder about it?

Please tell me your overall impression and be brutally honest. Also, is it too short or too vague? (Word limit: 500) Thanks.

There are two types of people in this world: the kind that are in the box and the kind outside of it. I'm the kind that's stuck in the box. To me, constraints and limitations are the most real. However, after seeing robotics after robotics competition, I can see that the winners don't break the rules, they just push them to the limit. That's why I'm always looking for a way to expand the box so that the outside becomes the inside.

That's why I get a kick out of Robotics. There are rules that have to be followed, but there's also a game to be won. This year in my Engineering Design and Development class, in teams of ten, a robotics system is to autonomously assemble another robot consisting of five separate modules that must fit within a 3 inch cube. The limitations on this problem are endless, ranging from the design itself to budget considerations. How can I take a 3 inch module and make it to expand? Can I find inexpensive parts that are small enough? There are so many problems and so many answers to each problem.

Pondering the solutions to each of these problems is frustrating, but finding a plausible solution is equally exhilarating. The team dynamics adds another layer to the whole design process. Every team member usually offers his or her own idea. With each suggestion, my goal is to find the problems with that design. Even the best of ideas, usually have some sort of flaw. I love looking for flaws not because I want to shoot down the idea, but so that we can determine if can fix the flaws and use the idea.

Robotics really makes me think. It's all about finding the problem and then solving it. The only reason it's exciting because all that problem solving is working towards that final product. When that idea finally does come together and I see the robot in action, it makes all that hard work worth it.

Note: Also, if it's a problem that I'm posting an essay again, I'm extremely sorry. Feel freee to tell me.

When I started reading, I felt dispirited. "Not another person claiming tritely to be an 'outside of the box' thinker," I felt. But, no: You have a unique spin on that trite saying. Good job!

- I used to be the kind of person stuck in the box. Constraints and limitations predominated my mode of thinking.
- An innocuous day like any other, after witnessing a fascinating robotics competition and indulging my compulsion to attend many more in the weeks that followed, it dawned on me that the winners don't break the rules, they reinvent and add to them with their own.

There's a start.

Your opening is shoddy, so is the ending; the example places too much emphasis on particulars and not enough on general values, and your transitions and flow of tone could use significant work.

You want to build yourself a Klein Bottle, then.

Your essay is good overall. I'd tighten up the writing a bit. Try to say everything you now using around 10% fewer words.