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Your reasons for wanting to serve as a Peace Corps Volunteer



esibinski 1 / -  
Aug 25, 2012   #1

Learning Health Major



"What do you want to do when you grow up?" was a question that I could never answer with a specific job or career in mind. My response was always "I want to help people". This is also the reason I decided to be a Community Health major. Since graduating a little over a year ago, I have determined that it is the ideal time in my life to do something outside of my comfort zone. Becoming a volunteer in the Peace Corps would provide me with the opportunity to not only strengthen my understanding about another culture, but to discover more about myself as well.

Working as a Dietary Aide in a nursing home was a huge turning point in my life. This job helped me recognize that my skills are strongest when I am working with people directly. The relationships I built with individual residents had a much bigger impact than the food that I served. This experience helped me realize that no matter what job type you have, you can still make a difference in peoples' lives.

As someone who is quite reserved, I approach situations thoughtfully and carefully. The decision to apply to the Peace Corps has involved a number of years of consideration. The two-year commitment has concerned me the most. The thought of leaving my family seemed challenging, my family is who I am. However, I have come to the realization that regardless of where I am in the world, my mom is still my mom, and my dad is still my dad. They have made me who I am today, and with their encouragement, I am eager to embrace a new experience, head on.

I can no longer remember why the thought of setting aside my personal life seemed so daunting. This same thought now ignites an enthusiasm in me that I am ready to take on. I am confident that I have the power to create change and I look forward to building a support system of mutual respect and learning.

leanne2012 1 / 1  
Aug 25, 2012   #2
It might have been helpful (for those reviewing your statement) to state what the challenges that you are addressing are.

Overall, I think it's a quality statement. Maybe add something in about your life goals (future career perhaps).

This is also the reason I decided to major in Community Health .

Becoming a volunteer in the Peace Corps will provide me with the opportunity

strengthen my understanding of another culture

The decision to apply to the Peace Corps has involved a number of years of consideration

Two sentences without a coordinating conjunction should be separated with a semicolon:
The thought of leaving my family seemed challenging; my family is who I am

The second half of this sentence has too many commas:
They have made me who I am today, and with their encouragement, I am eager to embrace a new experience, head on.

Cut out any unnecessary "that"s:
- What do you want to do when you grow up?" was a question that I could never answer
- had a much bigger impact than the food that I served.
- I have determined that it is the ideal time in my life
- I am confident that I have the power
I hope this helps and good luck!


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