'I seek change' - Why Rice?

What motivated you to apply to Rice University? Please be specific and limit your response to 200 words.

I seek change. I'm tired of my boring city of San Jose, everyone minding their own business with no intention of making new friends. Diversity is low and at night the city isn't buzzing, it sleeps. Houston might as well have insomnia because there is always something going on. I crave that southern hospitality, the fact that I can walk into a store and feel at home, never a stranger. Rice University is teeming with diversity however with Rice's small student body and low faculty to student ratio, everyone is one big family from the students to the teachers. The atmosphere at Rice has a certain warmth to it with the weather humid and the temperature hot, somehow everyone there seems comfortable from the Academic Quad to Greenbriar parking lot. College campuses are crucially important to me and the Byzantine style buildings are gorgeous on the eyes and a dream to work in. Residential colleges intrigue me. No more alpha, beta, sigma. No more hazing, roughhousing, and initiations. Everyone is a family yet everyone is so different. Everyone has unconventional wisdom. A prestigious school with a mix of bright students all inside a comforting owl's nest, that sounds like home to me.

Thanks for reading!

Buffomatic
I think you should try not to criticize San Jose and focus more on 'Why Rice.' Also, your essay seems to imply that you like Rice University only for its appearance. I think your essay will improve if you could discuss about their specific academic program and events etc.

what happens if i already talked about their programs in the previous short essay about why I'm applying to the school of choice?

Houston might as well have insomnia because there is always something going on. I think that suffer from Insomania is a better expresion in gneral but then it wouldn't really transport your message anymore. Either way, I think you should try to write another version of this sentence.

The atmosphere at Rice has a certain warmth to it with the weather humid and the temperature hot, somehow everyone there seems comfortable from the Academic Quad to Greenbriar parking lot. I would make two sentences out of that, one were you describe the weather (if you feel that is important) and then another one where you describe the social athmosphere that appeals to you. And mayb try to be more specific about that too.

hmmm, for some reason I'm left feeling unimpressed by your response and I think its because I have seen it time and time again from other applicants. There is nothing wrong with describing the aesthetic appeal of Rice or the surrounding city, but if you are going to do it find some way to make it stand out.

It doesn't have to be heavily stylistic or anything like that, but talk about something that is either unique to Rice or about something you saw while on a tour that caught your interest. As it is now, its bordering a "brochure" response. Find a way to personalize it.

So in closing let me say, I'm sorry if I came off as harsh :/ and Good Luck! I'm looking forward to seeing what you come up with.

I see your point dma. I think I will change it. It's too ubiquitous.