This is a draft of my stanford essay. It's still incomplete and full of mistakes. But can someone tell me how's the idea and how is it overall?
Stanford students possess an intellectual vitality. Reflect on an idea or experience that has been important to your intellectual development.
The giggling baby sun slowly rose over Teletubbyland. The catchy theme song began: "Tinky-Winky, Dipsy, Laa-Laa Pooooooo!!!"
Every day at 7 AM sharp, the eyes of a 2-years old me gazed at the retro CRT television in my parents' bedroom, awaiting for daily new episodes of the Teletubbies. For so many years, I was immersed in its fantasy world full of gorgeous flowers, cuddly rabbits, warm hugs and bumping tummies, that even before going to sleep, I would cover my head with a thick blanket, fearing that the Scary Lion would capture and eat me. The cartoon-ish show, which depict the story of four big-eyed creatures with television screens on their tummies, and swinging antennas on their heads, has been especially crucial in sparking my curiosity. If something appeared from "Over the Hills and Far Away", the Teletubbies would ask "What's that?" Watching my four big-headed and round-bodied friends questioning everything around them, soon, at sight of every unidentified or suspicious object I encounter in real life, I begun questioning everything, from my mother's brand new comb to the broken handled ladle in my grandma's kitchen. By exploring Teletubbyland, I discovered all the answers in the real world.
Rather than being a mere toddler TV show, the Teletubbies is thought- provoking one, allowing me to travel throughout the whole world from my bed, by watching from Tummy TV the Brazilian Carnival or children with colors during the Holi Festival in India; giving me the opportunity to express myself through dancing, singing, hugging and intellectually-stimulating activities like Cow-Milking, Custoast-making, which have over the years nurtured my imagination, and my enjoyment of life. Like Tinky-Winky, Dipsy, Laa-Laa and Po, let's allow our boundless imagination and curiosity to soar, let's question everything around us to obtain answers, and let's hug each other every time an opportunity shows up. The world, would have surely been a much better place if we had lived like the Teletubbies.
Holt Educational Consultant - / 14,835 
4783 Lorna, please do yourself a favor and do not use a program that you watched when you were 2 years old for this essay. The reason you should not do this is quite simple, there is no intellectual vitality to be taken from the musings of a 2 year old. You were neither able to understand what you were watching, nor create an opinion regarding what you were watching at that age. You were barely able to make out real words at that time. So you can see how hard it would be for the reviewer to believe the things that you are saying that you knew about at the age of 2.
In fact, reviewers do not take any experience between the ages of 0-12 seriously because the intellectual development of the child is not yet complete and as such, cannot be taken seriously as statements of fact within those ages. The actual understanding of life and the things that we view, in reference to an effect or understanding of what is going on does not totally exist before the age of 12.
If you truly want to prove intellectual vitality, then show the reviewer a well rounded interest in various topics. Show him that you are capable of discussing anything under the sun and that you are a voracious reader who learns from actual intellectual experience just as much as you can from books. The intellectual vitality is not limited to the written word. It extends to everything in our lives that we learn from. You just can't convince the reviewer that you had such a deep insight as a 2 year old. Most specially, not using the Teletubbies program.
