Prompt: The lessons we take from failure can be fundamental to later success. Recount an incident or time when you experienced failure. How did it affect you, and what did you learn from the experience?
* I need help editing this essay. I feel as though I have the basic idea down, but I don't know where to flesh it out more. For example, I feel as though the ending needs more information, but I don't know what to do with it. Any comments on it would be much obliged. For reference, the word count according to Google docs is 472. The paragraphs may be messed up due to formatting.
Looking back at my past, I cannot bare to remember my dismal attempts to assimilate into American society. As an Indian expatriate recently enrolled into an American primary school, I experienced the cliche fear that many other immigrants also feel: a fear of not belonging. This fear led me to long term failure both socially and emotionally. What I failed at was not something that could be defined quantitatively, but rather I failed in something as simple as being myself.
Now, while the very notion may seem absurd, allow me to elaborate. You see, during elementary school, I felt as though the kids around me did not accept me for who I was due to my Indian clothing and unrefined mannerisms. That led me to search for ways to establish better relations with my classmates in every way possible. Over time, my wardrobe changed, my hairstyle changed, my accent was lost, my English became more advanced, and I tried hard to communicate with my peers. However, this was to no avail. Nothing it seemed could help me make friends, but then I learned a word: mimicry.
I thought that if I could emulate the personality of someone, then I could make friends just as they did. At first, I tried mimicking one of the more reserved and "cool" boys in the class to no avail. However, I then attempted to emulate the class clown thinking that the attention would eventually lead to renown among my classmates. In the end, I got what I wanted, the position of class clown helped me create relationships with other students.
This idea of being the class clown for the attention and notoriety stuck with me till the latter end of the eighth grade. During that time, I fell into a depression brought on by being declared overweight and a series of subpar academic performances. In that time of need, I realized that I had nobody. The "friends" that I thought I had were not truly my friends. I was disillusioned with the way I had presented myself, which, in reality, never helped me create any meaningful relationships. In fact, I never truly presented "myself" at all, I was merely faking my personality to get attention. I had failed at a simple thing: being true to myself.
That summer before ninth grade, I set out to reinvent myself. I changed my hairstyle to the way I liked it, I bought a new assortment of clothes, worked out to be more comfortable with my body, and changed almost everything about me. I decided that I was done being a class clown. On that first fateful day of highschool, I felt truly myself. Soon, I made real friends, I joined cross country, and I did not feel alone or depressed. I felt truly happy, and I have ever since.
* I need help editing this essay. I feel as though I have the basic idea down, but I don't know where to flesh it out more. For example, I feel as though the ending needs more information, but I don't know what to do with it. Any comments on it would be much obliged. For reference, the word count according to Google docs is 472. The paragraphs may be messed up due to formatting.
Looking back at my past, I cannot bare to remember my dismal attempts to assimilate into American society. As an Indian expatriate recently enrolled into an American primary school, I experienced the cliche fear that many other immigrants also feel: a fear of not belonging. This fear led me to long term failure both socially and emotionally. What I failed at was not something that could be defined quantitatively, but rather I failed in something as simple as being myself.
Now, while the very notion may seem absurd, allow me to elaborate. You see, during elementary school, I felt as though the kids around me did not accept me for who I was due to my Indian clothing and unrefined mannerisms. That led me to search for ways to establish better relations with my classmates in every way possible. Over time, my wardrobe changed, my hairstyle changed, my accent was lost, my English became more advanced, and I tried hard to communicate with my peers. However, this was to no avail. Nothing it seemed could help me make friends, but then I learned a word: mimicry.
I thought that if I could emulate the personality of someone, then I could make friends just as they did. At first, I tried mimicking one of the more reserved and "cool" boys in the class to no avail. However, I then attempted to emulate the class clown thinking that the attention would eventually lead to renown among my classmates. In the end, I got what I wanted, the position of class clown helped me create relationships with other students.
This idea of being the class clown for the attention and notoriety stuck with me till the latter end of the eighth grade. During that time, I fell into a depression brought on by being declared overweight and a series of subpar academic performances. In that time of need, I realized that I had nobody. The "friends" that I thought I had were not truly my friends. I was disillusioned with the way I had presented myself, which, in reality, never helped me create any meaningful relationships. In fact, I never truly presented "myself" at all, I was merely faking my personality to get attention. I had failed at a simple thing: being true to myself.
That summer before ninth grade, I set out to reinvent myself. I changed my hairstyle to the way I liked it, I bought a new assortment of clothes, worked out to be more comfortable with my body, and changed almost everything about me. I decided that I was done being a class clown. On that first fateful day of highschool, I felt truly myself. Soon, I made real friends, I joined cross country, and I did not feel alone or depressed. I felt truly happy, and I have ever since.
