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UChicago: choose from one of our old prompts or create your own. Harvard: a topic of your choice.



dace 2 / 4  
Jul 10, 2017   #1
UChicago Prompt: In the spirit of adventure, choose from one of our old prompts or creat your own
Harvard : You may choose a topic of your choice.
When writing a topic of your choice essay, do you have to write the prompt you choose in the space provided before inserting your essay or do you just write.

UChicago or Harvard Topic of your choice

X years I have lived in this world; for x,I could not accept the "what",for x, I diced through the "hows", for x, I sliced the "whys" and now I try to realize who is standing in front of me. Each time I stare at the mirror, three people stare back at me - Intellectual, Adventurous and Artistic me(s).

Intellectual me yelped her first cry at xxxxxx, the busy town of yyyy. Outwardly, she is a charming young girl. In school, she is loved by her teachers and respected by her peers. Growing up as an only child, she received her parents' utmost attention - allotted her many advantages; she did not have to share her toys with any brothers or sisters, nor did she compete for attention within my family.She has supportive and loving parents who have always told her she could do anything she set her mind to. This phrase has set in over the years, and the encouragement it holds never fails to inspire her.They sent her to school in zzz, one of the top in the country, where she met peers who shared her academic interest.The intense but friendly academic rivalry has helped her set her standards and aspirations to a high level. She also took part in Olympiads,though she failed twice, it only gave her two reasons to try again

Artistic me naturally leapt out when she was introduced to the culinary world of baking- standing in the middle of the white-tiled floor of her mother's kitchen dressed in a flour-stained apron, oven mitts and a powdered face, armed with the harmony of the rhythmic shaking of sugar which marked the beat, , with the whisking of the eggs and constant setting on the timer, all merging to form the melody - the idyllic sound track of the kitchen. She enjoyed the slow process of measuring, sifting, and stirring; waiting as the dough rises in the oven and the house becomes saturated with the scents of butter and flour and definitely sugar; pulling the pans out of the oven and finding the dough transformed into something golden and beautiful which excites her core. While reducing the amount of sugar and adding a little salt, forgetting to set the timer or over-estimating measurements can result in calamities, a few alterations from the recipe can result to triumph. She learned that great bakers are never those who follow every line in a cook book but add their creativity to introduce something new to the oven.

My first time in an airplane - a two week trip to Ethiopia sparked Adventurous me. I will explain how I became adventurous.

I have just begun to realize who I am. I am the sum of my experiences, my genes, my personality. Though I am staring at a mirror, I am starting to understand that I am unique in my own way. There is no other way to put it; I am xxxx - intellectual, adventurous and artistic.

Should I submit this essay to UChicago or Harvard, as I do not want to send the same essay to two universities. The word count is around 480 or so out of 650. Is this essay good for either Harvard or UChicago, which does the essay appeal more to. Suggestions are highly needed. Go very hard on this essay.

Thank You.

I will post Adventurous me later, please just review this in the meantime.

Holt  Educational Consultant - / 15393  
Jul 11, 2017   #2
Ada, when you write this essay, it is best for you to develop your prompt statement first. What is it that you want to write about? Then come up with a creative title that best reflects the purpose of your prompt. If you can't come up with a good title, then use a prompt statement instead that explains what you will be writing about. From all of the work that you have written, my observation is that you are not capable of telling your story directly. You are always spending too much time on the background or basis of the story, which turns into a full essay unto itself. You must stop doing that. Your introduction should never be more than a paragraph long. The whole essay should be no more than 500 words long even with a 650 word maximum. It is not the length of the essay but the content of the essay that matters. If it is long but pointless, as your current essay is, then it won't help your application.

You must learn to clearly state your purpose without wasting the time of the examiner, who has to wade through a full page introduction before you get to the point. The point of your essay should come by the second paragraph. Not the second page, which is what is happening in this current essay of yours. If this is about your first time riding an airplane then make that clear from the first paragraph. Integrate the adventurous person into the paragraphs that follow. Don't write that as a separate page. Try to complete the essay within only 5 paragraphs in order to efficiently present your essay and prevent the reviewer from becoming bored with your essay because it takes you too long to get to the point.

If you feel that you cannot properly develop this essay on your own, then please consider our writing services above so that I can assist you in developing the paper in the best manner possible. You have to pick one story to tell, learn to most effectively present that story, and then actually write it in a manner that is best suited for your application essay. None of these essay will work so don't waste your time developing it further.


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