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UVA- challenge essay: Our mind - the brain. (250 words)



abcdefg 3 / 7  
Dec 30, 2008   #1
UVA- challenge

What work of art, music, science, mathematics, or literature has surprised, unsettled, or challenged you, and in what way?

*Dont worry about it not fitting the topic, i already asked admissions*

What holds the secrets to our past? The explanations of our present? And possibly the key to our future? What controls or explains our every emotion as well as our responses to these emotions? What directs our thoughts, thought processes, and dreams?

Our mind - the brain.

People choose to ignore the studies of cognitive science, neuroscience, and psychology simply because they do not want their lives to be empirical - to be completely predicable and accounted for by science. They, as do I, believe that life is spontaneous and changes every instant with every passing day. However, we cannot ignore the facts. There is a segment of the brain called the pons that controls something as impulsive as our facial expressions. Our senses of sight, hearing, touch, smell, and taste are not only regulated by the specific body parts they are associated with. Connecting to the ear, there are the auditory corticles, the auditory cortex and temporal lobes of the brain. The touch sensations coming from our body deliver signals to the sensory cortex that is connected to the parietal lobes. Likewise, every part of our body can be explained by a specific part of the brain.

Surgery on this magnificent and delicate organ first started when Ancient Egyptians began breaking skulls to release evil spirits. The practice has evolved to involve CAT and PET scans, and even modern technology such as fiber optics. The fact that one can actually change another human's entire life by operating on a fraction of this all-powerful structure is what surprises, unsettles, and challenges me to study cognitive science and neuroscience.

Tootley 4 / 10  
Dec 30, 2008   #2
I think you went too much into detail in the latter half of your first paragraph. I don't see a sense of surprise or unsettlement in your tone. It just seems like your spewing out way-too-technical information and this essay doesn't really say anything about you.

Maybe focus more on yourself and how these facts changed your perspective.
yee 6 / 39  
Dec 30, 2008   #3
I agree with Tootley. It would be a wonderful piece in a human discovery magazine, but it definitely does not fit the mold of a supplemental essay that focuses on not only the challenge but also its surprising affects/effects? (still don't know -_-) on you. Best of luck!

if you have a chance help me revise my essay:
mk415 5 / 4  
Dec 31, 2008   #4
firm essay but it makes it sound too much like a textbook explanation about the brain functions and etc. I think you should state more specifically of HOW it challenged you to think and HOW it surprised you rather than you were challenged and surprised. with more than thousands of essays for the same topic, i believe they would like to know more about your personality and how you interacted with the subject. gluck
EF_Kevin 8 / 13053  
Dec 31, 2008   #5
Our minds - the brain.

Connecting to the ear, there are the auditory cortices , the auditory cortex and temporal lobes of the brain. The touch sensations coming from our body deliver signals to the sensory cortex that is connected to the parietal lobes.

Likewise, every part of our body can be linked to a specific part of the brain.

The fact that one can actually change another humans entire life by operating on a fraction of this all-powerful structure is what surprises, unsettles, and challenges me to study cognitive science and neuroscience.

Nice!

Good luck.:)


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